I am currently in between jobs and have been asked by my parents(step dad and mum) to think about becoming my mums carer.
She is 82 and has dementia, whilst my step dad, who is 79, has been quite physically unwell for some time now and is finding it difficult to care for my mum and look after himself. This is causing him quite a lot of stress.
Mum does not like the idea of having an outside agency coming in, although I have tried to persuade her for coffee etc.
I have no idea where to start as I have been in work for a number of years and not had to fortunately rely on benefits, hence why I have no idea of where to start etc.
Both have a POA and a Will in place but don’t own their own home
Any help would be great, thank you
Caring for both parents is going to be very hard, throw in dementia and it just got worse, and far more stressful for you…
Carer’s Allowance is approximately £67 per week, you can’t live on that.
It’s very common for elderly parents to not want outside help, but the reality is that it is necessary. There comes a time when what a person wants is outweighed by what that person needs.
The first step is to arrange (with Social Services) a “Needs Assessment” for your parents, and if you really want to be their Carer, a “Carers Assessment” for yourself.
Be warned: S/S will do anything that they can think of to lighten the financial load on their employer. They will expect you to take on everything, they will try and force you you to do it. They are not averse to untruths. Don’t trust them an inch. Sorry if this sounds a bit dramatic, but it’s the reality of the situation, repeated daily, up and down the country.
Are both of your parents claiming Attendance Allowance? At the higher rate this is £89 per week for each parent. Dementia will also allow for a reduction in Council Tax.
Thank you so much for the reply.
Neither of them are claiming attendance allowance.
To the best of my knowledge I think my step dad is claiming the low rate DLA which he claimed for when mum first showed signs of dementia a couple of years ago.
I think they are also concerned that they will lose any savings that they have if I apply to be their carer!!
Do they have over £46,000 in savings? Yes/No? Your answer is crucial in deciding what route to take from here onwards.
Do they own their own home? Do you own a home of your own?
Any brothers or sisters?