finally got the keys to our new home. im so happy. wife is happy to but her Autism suffering with the change. lots of anxiety and panic setting in. we have a few weeks to complete the move so im looking for advice and ideas on how i can help reduce anxiety and help her feel more settled.
so far ive got;
Lists! i got a little note book just for the move so she can list and record window measurements and colours for the walls etc.
Getting her excited about decorating with me. we’ve chosen colours together and we’ve planned to paint together and have music playing. (shes built a decorating playlist.
A relaxation box. Because we will have bathtub in the new flat her mum gave her a bit of money so we went shopping and chose some new bubble bath, a new sponge, new shampoo and conditioner and i encouraged her to choose a scented candle she liked so that she can have a “Pamper Bubble bath”
any other practical ideas that ive missed?
Hi David,
It sounds like you have plenty of time to complete the actual move, which is great because doing it all in one day while anxiously waiting for the ‘go ahead’ signal is very stressful and you are avoiding that. That’s a positive to go on the list of good things.
Do not try to get your new flat ‘perfect’ before you move. That would put extra pressure on. Choose a room to decorate and do all the colour choosing, curtain hanging etc and plan to get that done. If you find you have time for another room, fine, but don’t put extra pressure into the mix. Sometimes you have to live in a place for a while and ‘get the feel’ of it before you decide what decorating would suit.
Make sure you have the essentials in place. Somewhere to sleep, somewhere to cook, somewhere to sit. All electricity, water, gas etc. working. Your wife might find making lists of everything absolutely needed for your first day in your new home enjoyable.
You are probably already moving boxes of things not in daily use to the new flat. I found it useful to put a list of contents inside each box so that you can find that ‘needed now’ thing easily and not have to rummage through everything as it’s bound to be in the bottom of the last one you look in!
Is the flat in an area you know well already? If not, perhaps a walk around the nearby streets to find the nearest shops, a park perhaps, hairdresser, post box, bus stop, all the things your wife might be glad of knowing her way to. Have lunch at a local pub? Is there a chip shop, a take away, restaurant you might use in future?
Have you met the new neighbours at all?
Has your wife told you what she is anxious about or is it the very idea of change? If you are spending time at the new flat, it will be becoming familiar already. It won’t be long before you both feel at home and settled.
Best of luck with the move.
KR
Elaine
hi,
luckily we are moving within the same town, just to the other end.
my wife is autistic and suffers greatly with change so this is terrible for her. As its council we have to get it all tied up at once so we have to move really fast. plus my wife cant live knowing more change is coming in terms of decorating so weve decided to crack it all out in one swoop so we dont have to keep moving furniture around.
the new flat is just down the road from a member of my wifes family that has been extremely cruel to her about her disability so she is terrified that we will see them more often. no neighbours met yet as they dont seem interested in meeting. they have seen us but wont acknowledge a greeting so my wife has decided she doesnt want to know them as its too difficult for her to understand why they wont say good morning.