Caring has changed my life

It has been a long journey over the last 2 years since my husband was off work with PTSD. He tried to get back to work but is clearly unfit for work and has taken early retirement on his GP’s advice. Since then we have had COVID to deal with so been isolated from family and friends for a long time. At that time we also moved house to a new area. and there was a huge change in our income!! I have found all that stressful without then becoming a full time carer.

We have had a huge change to our daily routine and we had no time to prepare for retirement. The hardest thing is not being able to plan a head as we don’t know from one day to the next how my husband will be. some days he just can’t go out the house or meet people socially. although i can leave him at home for an hour or two some times I cant plan that ahead or have to be prepared to change my plans.

Loud noises are a real issue for my husband so I go crazy if cooking sets off the smoke alarm. He just covers his ears, curls up and whimpers until the noise stops.

I seem to constantly be on red alert for triggers especially if we are out.

Having been free to get on with my life while he was working everything now revolves around the PTSD.

sorry I needed a rant. we are on a bad day today. thank you for reading and understanding

I understand that PTSD is horrible, but I really don’t feel that you should give up everything because of it. You have become a virtual prisoner.
Is it possible to make one room in the house more sound proof, a sort of refuge?
Maybe a thicker underlay, with thick lined curtains?
Does he qualify for PIP as he’s medically retired?
Are you getting Carers Allowance?

Thanks for your response. My other half does have his own room to retreat to and I have a hobby room. waiting for a sofa bed for my room so I can be more relaxed there. so we do get space from one another which is good.

He has the enhanced level of PIP with mobility allowance and I get the carers allowance. so that does help a lot.

I am probably a little over protective because it is horrible when things get triggered off. However, neither of let the PTSD become an excuse for my hubby to get out of responsibility where he is able to take it. Maybe in time as we adjust to the new situation and make friends it will be easier. we have made contact with a local church and will be meeting with someone from there next week to see how we can best get to know people during COVID restrictions.

Can’t your husband get help from the GP or mental health services for PTSD.

I have heard a new treatment EMDR, Eye movement and Desensitisation is very successful.

My husband does get help from GP and has had psychotherapy. In process of sorting treatment with Our new GP.