What do people here think about family members contributing money towards housekeeping? My son contributes and he has been told he shouldn’t be expected to do so.
Gilli
Each according to their means or … contribution to the " Family " unit if labour is included ?
( Most carers will have little to contribute by the way of finances but contribute most of the labour in order
for the " Family " unit to function. )
There is " No size fits all " solution.
Who told him?
My children contributed, because living isn’t free, and we all need to learn. Personally, I asked for the family allowance I lost which wasn’t a lot to ask. Oh,they had it back in many ways, but it taught them that ’ bills’ had to be paid. Its the way I chose, which may not suit everyone. Some parents asked for more, some less or none. Your way of teaching and expectations are your choice, and to be honest, and your business. Talk through with him why he should pay maybe?
It’s an age old debate this one!
All adults should be contributing to housekeeping, whether that is from their benefits or their wages. If they are sharing the family food, using the electricity and hot water, the toilet paper etc it all mounts up. It might have to be proportional to their means. Who told your son otherwise?
Melly1
Gilli, if your son is receiving benefits, or wages, of course he should contribute to the cost of the household. If someone is in residential care, they are allowed to keep £26 or thereabouts of their pension etc. as “pocket money”, so this should be a good starting point. My mum made me give her a third of my wages when I started my first job, my son gave me a quarter of his.
Social Services told me I should care for M for free, when I had no guaranteed income whatsoever, trying to sell my late husband’s stock of lorry spares to keep my head above water!! Finally they agreed to £100 a week, a few years ago, £120 a week now.
You cannot get anything for nothing in this life, as a general rule. So why should you pay for his foodetc? Looking forward, one day our children will have to manage without us, and it’s our duty to teach them how to manage their money. My eldest did an apprenticeship straight after school, has only borrowed once from the bank in 25 years, to buy a new vehicle. He has no debts, and a little “piggy bank” upstairs if he ever comes across something he needs cash for. Most importantly, he can sleep at night knowing he doesn’t owe anyone anything.
His only financial “problem” is that he hasn’t got a credit history!!
I think they should contribute, based on proportion of what they bring home. Even when my son was in JSA we asked for half that £25 a week. He was still eating 3 times a day, was home all the time with the heating on, council tax needed paying etc. He had to learn that life goes on and costs.
He didnt know we were putting it into an account for him. It was an important lesson. Now he’s working we make sure he puts he puts the equivalent into a savings account, because at some point we’d love him to move out.
Gilli, was it SS told him or someone else’s private opinion?
Thanks for all your replies. The general consensus seems to be that members of the household should contribute to the costs of running the household. My son contributes a fixed amount of cash once a week, which doesn’t go very far, but I am very grateful for it. It was he who was told that he shouldn’t be paying us anything, by someone whose business it definitely wasn’t.
Gilli