Hi my partner of 17 years we have 2 children together and she has just been sectioned with her mental health
She become really paranoid recently saying that people were talking about her and that her phoning is spying on her
Last week she spent all day in bed bad on the Wednesday
The following Thursday she woke up quiet manic just laughing at nothing and this continued to the evening
So I sat her down and asked is everything ok
It really came out of the blue and she told me she was in love with someone she hasn’t seen for 2+
Ok I thought no probs anyone can have a crush
Over the next few day she just withdrew herself from everything couldn’t make tea or even take her own medication
She become quiet delusional and confused also she stated to me that she’s been sleeping with my friends
Obviously quiet upsetting to hear that my partner of 17 years is saying this
she was sectioned on Thursday after seeing many professional to figure out what is happening to her
She admitted to a team of mental health doctors that she was hearing voice and seeing things
Now this has put be in a really shitty position obviously I love her to bits and want to support her through her troubles just like a partner would but at the same time I thinking what if what she has told me is true
I don’t know what she said to me was due to illness or if there’s truth behind it
Her mum had schizophrenia and she’s been smoking a lot of cannibis recently
Really tough times at moment
Welcome to the forum. It sounds like you have done the best thing and in managing to secure help for your partner.
Has she struggled with her mental health previously?
Since she is saying and believing that her phone is spying on her etc, therefore I wouldn’t take to heart the other things she is saying as her sense of reality at the moment is skewed. I know you can’t forget what she has said, but at the moment I would view these things as the paranoia talking.
I don’t have much experience with mental health issues as such. However I do feel for you.
My late husband has strokes with vascular dementia and other health issues. After the main Stoke he had delirium. He phoned me from the hospital accusing me of having a man in bed with me. Complete and utter shock set in with me. He also said I had left him on a ship. All sorts of things muddled his mind. We were happily married . I’m praying for you that your wife will respond to medication. I understand doubt has set in but try not to engage your thoughts with her psychosis. It’s obviously her mind playing tricks. Very hard to do I know
I am sorry to hear about your wife. A similar thing has happened to me. My sister came to me with mental health problems. She was seeing, hearing and feeling things not there. The medication can stop these all together in some people or for other people like my sister it makes it more berable. She had conversations with people that weren’t there. She did all sorts and said all sorts.
Sometimes she couldnt even recognise me or remember I even visited her. She said it was like having a movie in her head whilst trying to live life. She forgotten most things she did/said. I keep a diary of what happened and anything that seems to be sticking/of importance in conversation.
It can take a few months for someone to be on the correct medication as well. It took us 3 months until my sister could have a “normal” ish conversation where she actually understood who I was and what I said and was able to reply.
Its very hard, make sure you look after yourself and kids. I would wait until she recovers and can have a “normal” conversation and then ask about these things she told you and upset you. I had slippers and bins and all sorts in my face chucked, but my sister didnt mean any of it. 5 months on and she is still not out of hospital or recovered.
Thanks Yasmin for your reply
My hearts broken for her seeing her this why but I’m also hurting from what she has told me
The shocking thing about the situation is that we are young I’m 36 my partner 41 we have livid normal lives
My partner always suffered with social anxiety just going out for a meal would be a demand on her just because she always felt she didn’t look or feel good
She the most beautiful women I ever set eyes on
I’ve always told her you could wear a black bag out and still look amazing
But we were totally normal family until now
I plan of sticking around of coarse I do she my world my life
But boy it’s hard has she played with emotions I thought I’d never question
I feel if she doesn’t forget what she said or tell me it lies I feel our relationship would be over
I love the black bag comment. I’ve said similar to my wife over the years. I bet your wife didn’t believe you either! Admittedly, my wife reckoned I was just trying to save money…
Mental illness - anything to do with the brain - is a bit of a mystery, but we do know that people can develop false memories. My Mum, who has dementia, had a couple of Lulus.
The first one was a crash in the ambulance she was in while being transferred to another hospital: didn’t happen. She remembered every detail of the fire in the ambulance and the burns she got. She didn’t get any but the “burns” were where her cannula was that she kept taking out.
The second was even better: puppies coming onto the ward and distracting the nurses while other puppies stole the drugs from the medicine cabinet. The only explanation I’ve ever been able to come up with for that was that maybe there was a Pets as Therapy session, but by the time she told us the story she’d been moved to another hospital.
The funny thing is that of all the stuff she has forgotten from her recent life, she remembers these absolutely vividly. They never happened, but Mum is adamant that they did. Along with the “fact” that I took her to Australia for treatment.
It’s highly likely that your wife has embedded false memories in a similar way when having an episode, and she will believe it to be absolutely true. That’s unlikely to change with treatment, but it might. Science is a wonderful thing, but the brain is a mystery.
What I would say is that you can’t rely on anything she said when she was so ill. It’s highly likely to be rubbish and highly distorted.
My neighbour had to be sectioned years ago. It was very scary for her and for us. She lives alone and started behaving very oddly and we think it was triggered by a war in another country, which I can’t recall just now. I helped her all I could and took her to the doctors where she tried to climb through the reception “hatch” and I had to try and pull her back by her ankles!
Her driving licence was taken away and she spent many weeks in hospital. We did wonder whether the war in Ukraine would start her off again but she seems fine. I think wars can trigger something in people as when we first got married there was a chap across the road who used to keep knocking on our door saying “The Russians are coming” and he used to patrol the village telling everyone the same thing.
I do hope your wife gets the help she needs.the right medication will surely help.