newbie to the forum

Hi, I am Julie 62 years old and find myself being a carer for my 88 year ols mother. She is still quite mentally alert but her mobility is not good. She has had many falls and how she hasnt broken any bones I dont really know.
I also work part time for Mencap, so I am a professional carer too.

I am lucky that ny husband has reitred, but we have just found out that brother has been diagnosed with cancer, they live 2 hours away in birmingham and he lives with my 89 year old father in law. It looks as if my husband will have to spend some time down there helping them out.

Hi Julie … welcome to an extremely quiet forum as I type.

" Interesting " times ahead.

Any areas we can help with ?

What immediately spring to mind are :

Outside care support.

Upto date Needs and Carer Assessments.

Benefits / allowances … all out there being claimed ?

Brother / father-in-law … potential housing problems … especially if tenants … either social or b.t.l. … rent ?

Eventually , outside care support to keep each safe and secure ?

Your choice … others will be along to add their insights and extend their welcomes.

Hi Julie, welcome to the forum. I’ve been a multiple carer, it’s very difficult and can easily take over your whole life, if you let it.

The key is NOT to be a hands on carer, but a Care “supervisor”, making sure all the carees have what they need, without doing any regular “hands on” caring.
MUM- when did she last have a Needs Assessment from Social Services?
Does she have a Falls Alarm?
A Lifeline pendant?
Does she have over £23,000 in savings?
Own her home? Or now living with you?
Do you have Power of Attorney?

Similar questions for both those in Birmingham. Do NOT dash off at a moment’s notice, plan what you realistically can do, and arrange services for regular care and treatment.
How advanced is the cancer?
How much care does dad need?

Hello and welcome!

When was the last time you had me time? Me time is so important for unpaid carers. You need to find opportunities to have a break as well. Even if it is time that is spent at work or with friends it counts ultimately.

Does she own her home or not? There are many different security products available on the market these days. The other day I was going to work and I was listening to the radio on the way and suddenly there was a advert for a ring doorbell. Video Doorbell – Ring. Make sure to read all the reviews and check out the ratings too. If possible arrange for a demonstration.

What kind of cancer is it? How advanced? Macmillian can help you, give them a call on Monday or take a look at their site. There is lots of useful tips and information on there. Plus there are online forums where you can get to ask other people questions. Additionally I think that it is a good idea to order some of their helpful advice booklets or read their handy information leaflets. Ask your doctor about offline support groups.
There might be some in your area.

You need to draw up a schedule asap. Try to stick to it.