Hi. I care for my husband who has dementia. I’m struggling. We row a lot. He is forgetful and accuses me of not caring. I go to bed sad, don’t sleep well and wake us sad. I cry several times a day. My life has changed so much and I don’t know where to turn. I would love to communicate with other as who are in the same situation just to chat and perhaps get advice. Thanks for reading my message. Chris
Hi Chris, welcome to the forum.
I watched my lovely mum in law fade away, and then her daughter, my sister in law. Never a cross word between us in 34 years.
Have you asked your GP or Social Services for help?
How old are you? This affects the benefits you may be entitled to.
Does your husband get aggressive, so you feel threatened?
Welcome to the forum
My lovely husband suffered strokes with vascular dementia and other health issues.
I learned not to argue with him, as I was the one who was heartbroken, he seemed to forget that we had quarrelled! I walked away, took deep breaths, then suggested we had a cup of tea. He usually agreed. He could get verbally aggressive, something alien to him.
Have you considered contacting the Alzheimer’s society or if in your area the admiral nurses. They are usually very supportive. I too cried many many years and grieved for my husband pre dementia. Eventually treasured the good moments, and tried to let the not so good wash over me. Not easy but helped me cope.
I am a carer for my much older husband who is 83. He has not been diagnosed with dementia but is medically non compliant and frankly a very difficult awkward old man so I can relate to your post. The isolation is very tough.
No advice as such but for me I realised that I had to make my own life to an extent - hard as a Carer I know. I am an Admin for a local social group and have made a couple of friends through this. Frankly getting out for a coffee for an hour is a real treat. I also chair a local Book Club - husband insists on coming everywhere with me which is not easy as he does have some continence issues and a lot of breathing issues.