New on here


I’m a full time Carer for my husband who was diagnosed with Parkinson’s 6yrs ago. He now struggles to do even the most simple tasks and needs help with Washing, Dressing and getting in and out of bed. Some night he can need my help 3 or 4 times and most nights he will be incontinent and he may need changing along with the sheets etc and then washing.

I find the tiredness the biggest issue. Due to the nature of the help he needs at night I’m currently waiting to get him into Respite so I can get a complete break. This process started two months ago and have no idea when this will happen.

I just about coping at the moment, my fear is that something will happen to my husband or I will no
longer be able to care for him before I get the help I need.


Hi Angela,

welcome to the forum.

Is your husband getting support from outside carer workers too?

It’s no wonder you are exhausted - six years of caring takes its toll and now the sleep deprivation too.

Does he wear pads at night? I know a lot of carers find that placing a disposable rectangular pads underneath their caree really helps too. The puppy ones are cheaper and just the same as the ones for humans.

I suggest you contact the helpline to see if they can make suggestions to chivvy social care about arranging the respite

You can email at > > and we will respond to your enquiries within 10 working days, although it can often be sooner.

Our telephone helpline providing information is open from Monday to Friday between 9am and 6pm - 0808 808 7777



My husband wears pads at night and I use a bed pad also. Due to my husband not being able to lay straight these don’t always fully protect him or the bedding .

I contact Adult Services every week to see how things are progressing and I’m told someone will contact me if there is any news regarding respite.

Last time I contacted them ,they were waiting on the funding team??

Go back to social services and tell them that they are in breach of the Local Government Ombudsman’s guidance that the whole assessment process from first enquiry to first delivery of service should take no longer than six weeks. Ask them what they are doing to resolve the situation. You may want to talk to your GP about how you’re feeling as a letter or call from the GP might push them a bit…

Dear Angela


Welcome to our forum, I’m sorry to hear you are struggling to with Adult Services, as suggested by others, definitely get in touch with our helpline to see if one of our advisors can give you some advice. You can contact them either on 0808 808 7777 from Monday to Friday, 9am – 6pm or you can contact us by email

I’m not sure if you are aware but we are currently running a series of online weekly meet ups for carers to get together and chat informally. People say they’ve found it really helpful and supportive and it’s nice to be able to take a little bit of time for yourself. There’s no pressure to share any more than you’re comfortable with. Join up details are here:

We are also now running a weekly Share and Learn sessions, where we run a series of fun and relaxed online sessions where visiting speakers who share tips and skills on a range of topics - please have a look at the link and see if one grabs your attention.

Do join if you’d like to, we’ve had a lot of new carers join the sessions recently and it’s a great way to meet other carers.

with best wishes