Hi, my partner is Bi-polar and when he is unwell (with anything, colds flu etc.,) he becomes very angry with himself and me. He is currently unwell with a chest infection and whilst he has my sympathy for this I also find I am having to back away from him. I can’t do right for doing wrong ie; If I ask him if he wants to go for a short walk he says ‘don;t you listen, i’m not well’, if I say I’m going for a walk he’ll shout at me ‘you could just ask me, perhaps i’d like to go’ - I can’t win.
We recently discovered his 2 year old grandaughter had taken home a pillow case from ours because it was pretty. I asked for it backm a: as its part of a set and b: because children should know they can’t take things, his daughter agreed with this. He absolutely hit the roof and told me he was going to leave me - over a Pillow case!
Every day at the moment I am in the wrong about something. I am a safeguarding social worker so my working life is stressful, I ,manage my mental wellbeing by going to the gym (which he gets angry about because he can;t come with me) or watercolour painting (which he gets angry about as he feels I should be sat cuddled up to him watching TV), i’d like to be able to go for a walk with a friend but I just can;'t face the backlash from my partner.
I realise that his anger and frustration with me is really a reflection of his own anger and frustration but honestly I don;t know how much longer I can take it. I have tried talking to him and asking him not to snap or shout at me as I’m doing my best but that just makes him worse! Any tips gratefully recieved