My Mum's Care Situation

All about caring
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I heard some time ago that as family carer I have a right to be involved in my Mum’s care, which all involved sideline prefering to treat me like I’m interfering in my own Mother’s life. Is there a reference for this? Also that I’m supposed to be the named carer in charge of my Mum’s care, which yet again everyone discounts, as their attitude is that they’re not answerable to me; thus the myriad of problems that have taken place since my Mum needed care 2012 and still continue as the local authority prefer siding with the Care Agency rather than work with me.

My Mum has Dementia, which the local authority + Care Agency are aware of, yet have played us both off against one another even though I have Power of Attorney. Is there a reference that I should have a right and more to the point that my Mum has a right for me being involved? As all involved have insisted, claiming that my Mum ‘does not want you involved’ to brush me aside. There was one occassion when the Care Agency Care Manager actually asked my Mum who she wanted involved in her care, me or them - I have since been informed that should not have been asked, but as per usual they have treated my Mum’s care situation as nothing to do with me. One previous social worker actually has stated; ‘This is about your Mum, not you’. Where do these people get off? Unfortunately even all independent social workers have either been too busy to help, or they feel they can’t.

Was thinking of phoning CarersUK helpline to ask if they have someone legal that could clarify things, but when I have phoned not so easy getting through + the times I have emailed, their responses have always been in general ie contacting CAB/Age Uk…which I have done since 2012 and am more than exhausted.

All I need to know is references that I have a right to fully support my Mum as she needs and wants, as a mental capacity assessment was sent the local authority which got ignored; which stated quite clearly that my Mum wants me involved in her care and for me to deal with everything on her behalf. What gets me is how inconsiderate all ‘professionals’ are like they expect my disabled, frail and very ill Mum to deal with everything; where’s the ‘dignity + respect’ they claim to have towards my Mum?

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Good luck. I have no relevant advice or tips to share but definitely ring on Monday in order to get help. You are in my prayers.

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Hi Butterfly. Whilst carers do have specific rights, they are often ignored - especially when it has been decided by the professionals that the carer is complaining vexatiously. They will ignore any amount of documentation that supports the carer on those grounds, and reading between the lines I’m pretty certain that is what’s happening here. In the past, good advocacy services were vital in redressing the balance but advocacy is much harder to obtain these days - ironically, since the government made advocacy a legal right and tied it to a minimum standard that does not include this sort of issue.

Short of getting a solicitor involved - specifically, the one that did the POA - I don’t know what else to suggest.

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I strongly suspect that ignorance is involved here. The carers do not understand what having POA means in terms of Health.

Maybe you need to send a copy of what Health and Welfare POA actually means to the Manager of the service, and also do a laminated copy to keep with their records they keep at mum’s?

I once had to explain to the Learning Disability Area Team Manager what my responsibilities were as my son’s DWP.
I could NOT do whatever the support agency wanted, I had legal duties which if I didn’t comply with could lead to a 7 year prison sentence!!
He had absolutely no idea, despite his position.

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