With that timetable, there is no time for you!
Mum needs to accept carers or residential care. She has no right to take away your life. I know how awful this situation is.
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I can’t tell you all how much I appreciate your support .
I’ve just been to my partners for tea . Came home , doors unlocked . Mums sat here with her coat and shoes on with a toilet roll 
said she’s ’waiting For Ann to go singing’ I have an aunty Ann but she lives far away and hasn’t seen her much for a while .
Then she said she needs to ‘go home’ tomorrow
Then pointed to the nest of tables next to her and said ‘I’ve got some of these at home ‘
I’m actually quite frightened . It’s scaring me . That I’m here with this person who I don’t even know , who hasn’t had a care visit yet. . Ringing 111 may not be a bad thing, least she may get admitted again and give me a night or two off . Xx
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Agreed. 111 is now needed.
I once saved an old lady’s life. I called to see her, the house was freezing cold in the middle of winter. I was in warm clothing, she was wearing a light dress, so when I introduced myself, I shook hands. Hers was like an ice block, suffering from hypothermia Fortunately during my visit, I found out who her G P was, explained my concerns, someone visited and she was admitted to hospital immediately!
Mum is clearly unfit to live alone. Sad, but true. She should never have been sent home in the first place of course.
Sometimes, a picture is worth a thousand words, so if the opportunity arises for a picture of something appropriate, be sure to take it.
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@Alfieden12 BIG hugs - yes, if you’re frightened and getting scared call 111
Trust yourself. We’re here for you
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Excellent point @bowlingbun Photos and even recording her on your phone - incl when she’s shouting/raving at you
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I’ve actually just recorded a conversation we’ve just had about my uncle (her brother ) and my late father . They are / were both called John . She’s asking where her John is and my John . It all got so confusing even I wondered where either of the bloody johns were for a moment ! I am going to ring first thing in the morning. She’s currently taking clothes out of her wardrobe to ‘take home with me tomorrow’ couldn’t find her bedroom this evening etc . It’s going very badly is this very unwise discharge decision ! Xx
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Social Services always have to have an officer on call.
Mum has clearly “lost the plot” and needs urgent help.
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@Alfieden12 BIG hugs hon…thinking of you
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@Alfieden12 Can only echo the other posters. A photo is a good idea too. I have found 111 ok - if you can get ‘pushed up the chain’ then often you will get to speak to a Doctor or Nurse. Our service seems to have ‘out of hours’ GP’s on call occasionally when I have called, and they have come out. Also they can send out paramedics. The frustrating part is having to get through the mega facile questions. Good luck and I am truly sorry you are having to deal with this. Your mother really is a danger to herself.
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Thank you all so much for your help and advice
Well this morning I woke at 715am thinking ‘what’s that noise?’ So I got up and had a look , no lights on anywhere but mum not in her bed . She had made her way to the spare bedroom and was on the floor , soiled herself . Didn’t know how long she’d been there and couldn’t tell me . I got her up and unsteadily she got back into bed . She could have been there for hours and because I’m already exhausted I didn’t hear her . It’s snowing badly here aswell, it’s very cold and she was just in her nightdress . Stupidly I didn’t take a photo but we all know it will happen again and I’ll be ready to take a photo then .
Would you all advise I ring 111 or go down the on call social worker route?
I fear the social team don’t believe me and I’m scared I will lose my temper (I can be quite fiery )
There’s only this group I can turn to, family (aunties / uncles / cousins ) do listen but then I think they get bored of me
Xx
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I think Charles is your best bet for good advice. However I would call 111 and keep stressing that she is a vulnerable adult and that they have a Duty of Care to keep her safe. Also stress if anything happens then it is THEIR responsibility not yours as you have told them she will be alone and your opinion she is NOT safe.
Good luck - I can only imagine how stressful this is for you. She is obviously not safe to be alone and delerium needs to be ruled out especially if there have been incontinence issues.
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@Alfieden12….I think you should call 111, especially if you don’t know how long mum was on the floor for. Hopefully that will escalate them to send someone out which will then get things moving in the right direction for you both.
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I’d ring Social Services too, so you don’t end up in a ping pong situation where each says the other is responsible. Stress that you have to go to work tomorrow, Mum clearly needs 24 hour care so something must be done TODAY.
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I rang 111 explained what had happened . Paramedics came and have taken her back to hospital for a scan etc they did ecg here and were concerned about her breathing saying perhaps starting with a chest infection . I knew she should not of been discharged I knew it… as we all did . Thank you all xx
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@Alfieden12 I am relieved for you. At least your mother is safe. But how sad that you and she had to go through all this.
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When you have calmed down from these traumatic days, consider writing to the CEO of the hospital, headed UNSAFE DISCHARGE.
Explain that your views were utterly ignored and mum was placed in danger, and write a list. They need to know what is going on in their hospital.
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Absolutely . But the thing is now that she has been taken back into hospital as she’s fallen surely they will see this as an unsafe discharge ?? I have just rang on duty social worker and said all this … she has been home since Thursday and is now back in xx
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@Alfieden12…that’s good news that they’ve taken her back to hospital. Hopefully you can relax for a while now. Sending a big hug 
your way.
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@Alfieden12 Well done. I agree with BB re complaining, but try to get a bit of a break while you can. There’s no guarantee that the battle is over yet.
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TBH from your first post, it screamed ‘Dangerous Discharge’ to me and others. I really hope that the hospital takes notice and works with you. Also I think BB may have said that hospitals are fined if patients end up being re admitted but I could have this wrong.
I agree that it would be great if you could put in an official complaint BUT I also agree you need to step back today and try to relax and catch up on sleep if you are working tomorrow. Charles may be right and you ‘have won the battle but the war is still going on’. It should NOT be like this for any of us but your situation is not unique on the Forum.
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