we had are 1st call from cpn mental health worker today since lockdown allthough we was leaving messages for help and advice it is a gisgrace and yet i saw somewhere it says your not alone , we are alone ! and totally fed up
It must be very hard not to be receiving any support when the authorities say help is available. Hang in there, Dean.
many thanks for your reply Rosemary_1706 , yes it is very hard to get support even before covid as proffessionals dont understand , now with covid about they still dont understand how much pressure carers are in at home trying to look after there loved ones when there loved ones dont do alot due to low mood which puts more pressure on me as a main carer
Just wondered if you’d explored the site by Lloyds Bank and Mental Health UK, and Rethink Mental Health:
I hadn’t heard of those sites before. There might be something useful there, beyond the basic stuff.
Do you and your wife do any meditation / mindfulness or listen to relaxing music at all.
There are webinars available free to all from South London and Maudsley Recovery College at
MIND.org may be worthwhile. I’m finding it’s quite helpful, although I waited 11 months for it.
Hope you find something useful from my suggestions.
many thanks Rosemary_1706 for your reply and advice , the problem i find is trusting proffessionals due to my past and proffessionals saying we cant help but they can and you just go around in circles in trying to get help and advice from proffessionals maybe i am scared of being let down yet again after trying for 24 yrs in trying to get support . thankyou for your suggestions
Oh how I agree. My time caring is not so long, but has still had an effect on my mental health. Dad came to me at the beginning of March due to the pandemic. He is now in end stages of heart failure, with COPD, reduced kidney function and an itchy rash over whole torso which is now spreading down the backs of his legs. He needs help with so many things, but doesn’t really remember how much help he needs when talking about returning home where he lived alone. I know it sounds selfish, but in his mind his needs come first before any of my needs, but that’s just the way he is. He is 94, almost 95. Phew, what a carry on. I have 2 brothers who live in different parts of the country. One retired as a GP about ten years ago and his advice has been very helpful. Sorry for rabbiting on, but I didn’t understand how to put this across anywhere else. Just so you know, I am with you in spirit and fully understand your frustrations. There is just me and Dad in the bungalow with my dog who has kept me going.
it does no matter where you look or get advice from about your problems its getting the right help that does not happen from proffessionals this is how i feel
so there for people feel lonley , depressed , isolated , sucidal , when will it stop !
Dean
I think the thing that helps me is taking a little time for myself, even if the work is piling up. So what if the house is a little messy.
Suggestions:
A small walk each day
Dancing to music
Reading self care books. Melly suggested a selfish pigs guide to caring which I found really helpful.
Listening to music
Meditating
Anything really that gets your mind away from the problems.
I am concerned you feel suicidal. Have you phoned the samaritans who will listen. Or carers Uk. OR your GP. Sometimes offloading helps.
I wish you well.
many thanks for your reply Cloudygal
since the goverment has open / aloud people to go out beach / park etc we have been going up the park with our dog for 45 minutes a day cafe is open social distanceing in place no toilets at all plenty of bushes etc
as i am the main carer for my wife i cannot let the house get into a mess as my wife is in a low mood , we dont read , we dont really listern to music , i cannot do any Meditating as i feel there is to much going on
my point is that when trying to seek help for problems from proffessionals its like they are passing you on like a bag of rubbish
i didnt say i was sucidal what is said was
it does no matter where you look or get advice from about your problems its getting the right help that does not happen from proffessionals this is how i feel
then i said so there for you feel lonley , depressed , isolated , sucidal , when will it stop ! sorry for mis understanding i will admend my post