Im struggling

Dear Sir/Madam,

I am struggling to find help via my mother’s GP, mostly for her but somewhat for myself also.

Basically my mother has mobility problems, and is afraid to go out unless persuaded. I need some support too and someone to talk to. I have asked many people, but everyone is giving me the cold shoulder.

Mothers health is not getting better, she is emotionally distraught, and all this is affecting my mental health too. Not only am I stuck in a groove in terms of gaining employment (I have never secured a job fro more than 7 months, even though I have a degree in medical sciences, that I got in 2005, lo and behold) but I feel afraid to socialise with people or date any girl. People have let me down and I am so afraid of what the future holds. I fear for the health and safety of my mother. This is coming from a guy who came to Leeds in 2001 as a teenager, to seek his fortune, yet has ended up as a 36 year old socially withdrawn, computer game addict.

I have contacted this service many months ago, but i do not recall what became of the it. At that time it was just mother i was worried about, but now i feel that if i start malfunctioning, then who will look after mother? No one is offering a helping hand, so I guess I have to look after her, after all.

I also have problems associated with my father, who is also socially isolated/withdrawn. But seen as I have already typed too much to read, perhaps I could shed light on this later on. Could someone be able to help me with regards to this? Thank you.

Please could you help me, I would be very grateful. Thank you.

Hi Mohammed … welcome to the canteen.

Far too many carers will related directly to your own circumstances.

First step … your LA for both Needs and Carer assessments :

Needs … NHS guidance :
Getting a social care needs assessment - NHS

Carers … our own CUK :

Carer's assessment | Carers UK

Once those have been done … and you are SATISFIED … should ease the pressure you are currently under.

Only one snag ? May take a while for both to be done … anytime from 2 to 12 months.

A request for " Urgent " assessments may carry weight … especially if your gp adds his / her recommendation to either , or both … a real post code lottery out there.

On the mobility side , might be a " Mobility " nurse within your local gp surgery ?

If not , check with your hospital … some have been known to come out into the community.

Have a read of both links … then return to us with any questions and / or observations.

We’re here to help and assist fellow carers as best we can.

Any problems in other areas ?

Finances / benefits … housing … wills … Power of Attorneys … etc.etc.

Just ask !

Welcome to the forum.

Can I ask how old your parents are?
Is there anything physically wrong with them, or are they just not engaging with their local community?
Is English their first language? Please don’t be offended by this question, my family has many nationalities in it. I’m just wondering if this might be a part explanation.
Do either of them claim disability benefits?

In my opinion, you need to find a psychologist who can help you with your social problems. Perhaps your father and your mother can start seeing a psychologist too, or you can find a psychologist who can come to your home to make it easier. As I understand it, both father and mother do not like to go out, so maybe if a psychologist can come straight to your home it will be much easier.

I am locking this thread as the original poster has not revisited the forum for over a year.