I just can’t do this anymore

All about caring Young adult carers
1

Hi, sorry for writing another post. I guess I just feel better knowing I am directing this at someone rather than speaking to the air.

So as things stand I am just a nervous wreck. I am also teaching taking up to 10 various tablets a day for my conditions. I have to take my normal tablets which are related to another condition but nothing to be alarmed about -it is just pcos.

However the others are all mental health related. I have to take sertraline, propanol and I have also been taking Kalms just to get me through each day. I have also been ill recently so I have been taking cold and flu medication. Taking 10 tablets a day is so excessive too, I am used to about three. I have contacted my doctor, just waiting on that. I may see about getting a triage assessment with mental health also.

Lately I am just so on edge and I am trying to find the answers all the while mum is just going too far. I just want things to be okay, however she just doesn’t want to listen. I keep telling her what to do and how to deal with things and how to keep it all away from the courts but she won’t listen. She feels the need to prove herself all the time, but then I keep saying what if she doesn’t win, then what? She is choosing to win over her children’s sake.

We went to the police station the other day to hand over some evidence I have. I was really struggling that night and was quite ill. I was also getting too stimulated and wanted to go home. I had a massive coughing fit. Mum didn’t get the outcome she wanted and started being very questioning towards me. She knew I was having a coughing fit but kept asking me questions. Naturally I couldn’t answer.

I know this guy abused her, but the way the system is I can’t help but feel like she made the biggest mistake reporting him and letting it get this far.

2

Hi Coolcar,

The meds for PCOs can’t be avoided, you’ll soon be off the cold and flu meds and for now need the mental health ones. It might be worth having a pre-payment card for your prescriptions so that it works out a bit cheaper:

I used this when I was taking a regular meds for my OA.

You seem to back to being full circle with your Mum once more. Time to consider again, now she has a social worker (albeit part time), paid carers etc whether you are going to end all the support you are giving her, or are you going to carry on as you are?

There is a lot to weigh up, definitely not easy - but it’s up to you. Is now the time to put your own needs before your Mums? If not now, when?

3

Agree with Melly. Do not mean to sound hard but your mother is an adult, and therefore able to make her own decisions even if they are very poor. I really feel for the stress you are going through trying to help her but sadly you cannot ‘fix’ her. If she has Carers and a Social Worker, you have done your best and made them aware she is a ‘vulnerable adult’. I realise it is easy for me to say, but you need to start to disengage and concentrate on your own health. Do you have a counsellor? If so hopefully they can help you disengage? I get it wont be easy.