I am a 26-year-old carer for my father who has cirrhosis of the liver, atrial fibrillation, Barret’s oesophagus, chronic hypertension, dead nerves in his leg, depression and urethral stricture

He takes over 30 tablets daily and I am the one who sorts them and I support him to appointments as well as doing shopping etc.

I juggle this with my job as a care assistant as well as 3 voluntary jobs, running my house which I share with my husband and helping my mum who has survived cancer 4 times and had a heart attack in 2002.

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Sheryl hi - that’s a lot of health problems your dad has! Does your mum live with him? You are very young to be coping with two frail-health parents, but I’m glad you have a husband to support YOU (so easy for those who support others, NOT to have any support themselves…)

Do your parents accept any ‘outside carers’…or do they just want YOU? That can be problematic!

Hi Sheryl,

That’s too much to do and have a life of your own. I was a multiple carer, newly widowed, newly disabled in a car crash, with a disabled housebound mum and son with severe learning difficulties.I had counselling to help me work out priorities. Son had to come first as he couldn’t speak for himself, but mum could. Mum could also afford to pay a girl to clean, and a gardener.
You need to become their Care Manager, not care giver, for the basic stuff - there will always be the little extras for you to do!
YOU decide what your priorities are, who comes first, don’t do what I did behave like a dutiful little girl who never said No to the parents.