Don’t think I can do this anymore

With regard to the family, did they help? No? Then they’ve no right to say anything about what happens now. You were the carer, you are the one to decide if mum now comes home, or needs permanent residential care. This may be the only practical option left. She needs to get better before you can care for her, or even consider her future.

Agree with BB - if no help was offered by the family, then what rights do they have to dictate the amount of care you are able to provide?

Please DO NOT be bullied into moving in and losing your own home. You really do need to refuse to provide any care, unless there is a care package in place, when she comes home.

I honestly do not think you are selfish.