Can I please get some opinions on this situation from fellow carers please?
My medically non compliant difficult 82 year old husband had a thorax scan on 21st December partially due to his worsening cough including coughing up pink stained sputum. We duly chased the Surgery as we basically wanted a medication review but they were not prepared to do this until the scan results were back which I did understand. However by 19th, I was getting concerned. We phoned the Consultants Secretary and she intimated that the scan was probably ok if we had not heard and that she would ask the Professor if a copy could be posted out to us. She phoned back on Thursday and said the Prof had reviewed the scan and there were areas of potential infection on the lung, and the Prof was going to write to the GP asking for a course of antibiotics. She had previously said he had a telephone app on 13th May and hopefully he would have various breathing tests prior to this, but there was a waiting list. I was frankly gobsmacked at how an infection dating back to Dec 21st had not been picked up. She also said he had to have another scan in 3 months which frankly makes me wonder if something has been found as this was not mentioned until the Prof saw the scan. I do feel the scan was not looked at properly initially and it was only when we chased, that the issue was noted.
We phoned GP Surgery hoping that the letter requesting a/b had been emailed/faxed but not received. We did get a call from a NP who would NOT prescribe a/b without the letter - even a broad spectrum one. She also said that the scan suggested inflammation not infection! But I definitely heard the Secretary say a course of antibiotics. I tried calling the Secretary after NP had phoned but it was 4.30 so no reply.
I guess all I can do is chase again on Monday? Husband has had pneumonia before and a pulmonary embolism. Also the coughing is so bad that most mornings I am woken up at 2.30-4 and quite often get up at 4am. I totally get that the NHS is under pressure, but surely this is not acceptable? I guess all I can do is wait and if things go beyond a certain level call 111? He is determined he is NOT going to go into hospital though but when he had the emobolism, his breathing was so bad he called 999. .
Definitely chase the secretary on Monday. I don’t honestly think there’s anything else you can do.
And yes, I can understand why you’re angry about this - it really is unacceptable.
Helena, I would suggest chase up on monday and find out what is going on.
ring 999 even if husband does not want to go as all calls are logged, more ammo for you to have a go at them about your husband.
have you spoken to anyone at your local carers centre,age uk or citizen advice for help?
also keep a diary or log when speaking to people as it will help you for looking back on information u might need.
Thanks Charles and Michael. Yes I will call Monday, and progress.
Michael I do have a Carers befriender BUT husband is a very difficult controlling man 23 years my senior, so it is very difficult to talk honestly as husband is always there. He is even jealous of me having a befriender as he says he is the one who is ill. Believe me, he is his own worst enemy, and at times it takes every ounce of compassion I have to carry on caring, but I want to keep my home and my cats.
We are together 24/7 and he has lashed out in the past, so I am very wary against going against his wishes, whilst he has mental capacity and can make his own decisions. In an emergency, I would of course call 999. At the end of the day, my main motivation is keeping myself and the cats safe. We are at different GP Surgeries as he changed back in 2013, when my GP thought he was ‘confused’ leaving the Surgery and threatening to sue. So very hard to get help from the GP .
ah I see, I have been there with my mum over what is best for her but also other parts you talk about. what you need is acares need assessment to help you with matters that might arise. you husband should have a mental health check not because I am saying he is mad,far from it. But the way he is changing his mind and lashing out he might need extra help and support as he is ill at present. Don’t be afraid of him, if it getting to that stage stay some where else or have a police welfare check done just to protect your self and him. they can speak to the right people sometimes and make sure you get the help you need.
Micheal I have indoor cats who are totally my world so leaving not an option. Sorry but NO WAY am I leaving my home and my cats. If that means my fear of my husband means I may not be acting in his best interests, risk I am prepared to take. I have written to his GP stating this - we are at different Surgeries as he left mine when my GP said he was ‘confused’ and threatened to sue!
Good news is that a/b started on Tuesday. He does not seem that good but will monitor carefully. He did have significant brain atrophy back in 2013 but GP did test after District Nurses worried he may not be acting in his best interests, and his GP said he was fine! He is a very clever man and even one of the Consultants said he would run rings round the Mental Health Team if I got them involved. At the end of the day, all I care about is keeping myself and the cats safe. I will continue to do the best for my husband until it gets to a crisis stage when yes, I will involved the emergency services.