Accusations/treatment by 'Carers' Centre

I have struggled getting support from my local Carers centre, and have just received the most shocking letter from them accusing me of being ‘disrespectful and abusive to staff’. When all I have tried to do is get the information needed, but been fobbed off by staff to ‘bear with them as they have a full case load’. In effect it’s a one-way street: their way. They don’t care or want to know the stresses I’m dealing with on a daily basis…is this how ‘Carers’ Centre as supposed to run?

The Manager has actually finished the letter with;

‘If you wish your contact details to remain on the Gaddum database, please can you treat all staff respectfully or will have no alternative but to no longer provide support.’

They class themselves as a ‘charity’.

All this is adding to the list of those that choose to vilify me and confirming my life ain’t worth it in such a callous/heartless world.

Can you go elsewhere or not?

I only ask for help when I’ve nowhere else to turn to, when whoever I’ve approached recommends I contact the local Carers Centre.

Anyway, once my Mum’s gone; so shall I. I’m expected to be perfect; when they are far from it and vilify me coz I’m not…how pathetic is that?!

I too have had similar issues with a carers centre they have a fancy website promising the world but I think really they are overwhelmed and underfunded.

In the old days they had the time and staff to help you every step of the way, provide advocacy, attend benefit tribunials, do home visits.

Now it just seems to be a telephone service signpost you else where/fob you off as you say.

Have they got a mission statement that we promise etc etc?

Theres a page of grinning trustees on my carers centre site, I’m and I have been doing this that or the other for years.

I would write a polite letter to one of the trustees explaining the situation you are in, stressed unpaid carer, very frustrated, depressed, no help and support, you need access to fast and accurate information and support.
That is why carers centres were set up to prevent unpaid carers getting to crisis point.

It appears to be the ones that shout the loudest that get the help but you have to shout quietly and be polite.
If you want to message me I might be able to help more.
Our carers centre was set up by a lady who was looking after her mother and there was just no support, no guidance, her mother was just sent home from hospital and that was it she had to look after her.
There was no where she could turn to for advice support, a listening ear.

Maybe try making a list of activities for them to offer?

What does it say on their website?

Sticking plaster solutions when surgery is needed ?

In which case , a " Carers Centre " … run by outside " Professionals " or carers themselves … are NOT equipped for the latter.

Never have been , never will be.

CAB at the very minimum ?

Even then … " Sorry squire , a little too hot for us , you’ll need a solicitor. "

( Short of a free half hour " Consultation , no monies , legal aid probably unavailable due to the recent cutbacks … what do you do next ? )

A never ending introduction to the System when things go wrong.

This is the email I sent their Senior Management;

Hi there,

I have received the most insultive and disparaging letter from the Team Leader of Bury Carers Centre, this is why I am writing to you – they have never been the least interested.

I read on your link on Bury Carers Centre;

Gaddum Carers Bury aims to improves the lives of carers throughout the borough.
This is a service for carers who provide unpaid care or assistance for a relative, friend or neighbour who is frail, has a disability or a long term physical or mental illness.
This service works in partnership with the Local Authority, CCG and other voluntary organisations to provide information, guidance and practical and emotional support to Carers

These are blatant false claims, as I have not received any such emotional support; only vilified, condemned like a criminal and disrespected; when I am very ill with all the stresses (which I am on long-term sickness with my mental health) of dealing with my Mother’s situation all on my own and no-one to turn to.
No such level of humanity has ever been afforded myself throughout the time I have been in contact with Bury Carers Centre, which has been since 2012. Charity I’d hoped would include compassion, understanding and above all tolerance for what an unpaid carer has to deal with. Life has always been a 2-way street, but when I have constantly been met by one of Bury Carers Centre’s call handlers, of being snapped at ‘bear with us, we have already a full case-load’, which is totally unnecessary. I shouldn’t be made to suffer more ill health at how Bury Carers Centre, now including their own Manager choose to treat me.

Very disappointed,

I spoke with someone at CAB just the other week, they’re not interested - coz they only provide on Legal Aid basis. Discrimination everywhere.

Even contacting a local solicitor; having to through a impossible hurdles no-one’s interested lifting a finger to help with. Ie I asked my Mum’s GP last 2 years to carry out MCA who refuses.

There should be a Carers Bureau in every city: willing, able and trustworthy; to provide the necessary support as + when needed. Money is available, they need to wake up and carry out their duties for Carers’ health at serious risk. I shouldn’t have to feel suicidal coz the system’s not fit for purpose.

A " One Stop Carers Shop " … with teeth ?

( Make that a one stop , carers/ carees shop ? ALL organisations under one roof … and one banner ? )
( The dust I had to blow off that one ? )
( From part of this forum which no longer exists … but the thread does ! Just see the response it got ! )

Been muted since … 2004 … most of my posts on said subject now lost in the mists of time … and closed forums !