New to forum

Hello. My name is Barbra and it is the first time I have ever taken part in anything like this but I feel so alone in caring for my husband so it will be good to have a listening ear and maybe I can help some one else along the way.

My husband had a stroke 2 years ago which has left his right arm paralysed and severe weakness in his left leg that severely affects his balance. Added to this he has Auto Immune Hepatitis for which he takes immuno suppressants. These drugs have brought on skin cancer. Understandably he is depressed and was never one of life’s happy bunnies in the first place!

He is totally dependent on me and cannot be left for more than 2 hours in case he needs the toilet. We do not qualify for any funded help although I do now get a 3 hour weekly respite under the take a break scheme.

We have 3 adult children but for various reasons none of them are able to provide any respite unless we visit our daughter in Northern Ireland. My husband refuses to consider moving there.

Rant over! Will try and keep future posts objective and positive.

Rant over! Will try and keep future posts objective and positive.

No need this forum is for the opposite of that. Rant away this is a safe place all anonymous.

Please tell why you feel you are not entitled to any funded help. Do you claim carers allowance.

Hi Barbra … welcome to an extremely quiet forum as I type.

Immediate thought … what outside care support are you receiving ?

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We do not qualify for any funded help.

Needs / Carer assessments upto date … even if everything comes with a price tag ?

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I do now get a 3 hour weekly respite under the take a break scheme.

( Unique to your manor ? Most don’t even get that without a price tag. Many carers qualify for free respite care but …
face a charge for someone to replace them as the carer. The classic Catch 22 ? )

CHC / NHS Continuing Healthcare a factor here ?

Down the line … a nursing home the only real alternative ?

( Bugle call for AGE UK : https://www.ageuk.org.uk/ : what they cannot advise on is not worth knowing ! )

Benefits / allowances … all out there being claimed ?

Housing … any problems ?
( Consider in conjunction with a possible , future , move into a nursing home ! )

Others will be along to extend their welcomes , and add their insights.

If you don’t qualify for any help, presumably that’s a formal decision by Social Services because you have over £46,000 in savings.

How old are you both?

IF this is the case, then sort out some care for yourselves. If you have under that figure, ask Social Servces to reassess you.
Hopefully you are already claiming Attendance Allowance?
If your husband is affected mentally, he might be totally exempt from Council tax.