My husband was diagnosed with Parkinsons a year ago both still struggling. I have health issues very anxious ,suffered for months with dizzy spells gp said it was Labrinthitis going to refer me to ENT the waiting list are so long I don’t know when I will be seen.Decided to pay for Private BRAIN MRI consquently my Consultant is now referring me to NHS stroke clinic waiting again. I am at my wits end with worry.
I just want to reach out and talk to people.
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Welcome to the forum. Just a few quick questions to start.
How old are you both?
When did you last have a benefits check?
What help are you currently getting?
Do you have over £46,000 between you? Just Yes/No is fine.
Back later, have pastry and marzipan to make!
My Husband is 78 I am 73.We havent had a benefits check. We don;t have any help. Savings no
Under those circumstances, especially with your own health being fragile as well as your husband’s, I would suggest asking Social Services for a Needs Assessment for your husband and a Carers Assessment for you (not done at home so you can be honest without your husband hearing. Think about what you struggle with most, what you would like to change most? Do you have time to go to an exercise class, an art class, for example? Your own health is very important.
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My Husband. Has always been so independent he won’t get involved with Social Services or any agencies.
I am waiting at the moment for Ref to stroke clinic following BrainMRI we had to pay for privately.
I used to have a busy full life worked until I was 67 lots of things after Covid.
Until I get APPT I feel my life is on hold.
Something not nice but needed doing we have been to put funeral arrangements in place today.
Next we need to get POA and wills sorted out I have explain how important it is but it take time.
@Wee_Man I think it is really good that you are reaching out. It can be so lonely to be in the middle of all this. I have only reached out recently and already found the support here so reassuring.
Have you got support around you, friends and family to help? But it is also nice to be able to talk here where there is no judgement and just support. Sending love
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Hi Tiredanne All my family live downsouth.since Covid when I retired friends I had dont live near and I don’t drive. I just need a group to relate to and try to make some contacts and friend..I am a friendly soul good mixer but since husbands illness seem to have lost my wayThanks for contacting me
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@Wee_Man Hello from me too. If you are a social person then isolation is very very hard. Would a Book Club be an option? Also do you have a local Support for Carers? If so then they can sometimes provide a Telephone Befriender and often they have been Carers themselves. Some branches have meetings.
My husband is 86 and medically non compliant. The only way I have kept my sanity is getting out for short periods and I have a small circle of good friends. Some I met through the Book Club. I found Covid hard too as had to give up showing my beloved cats, Rotary and the Wine and Book Club and it was a real fight not to sink into clinical depression.
It is hard to make new friends when older but it is worth seeing what is available locally. I always do my hair and makeup and go and get the paper and even saying hello to the dog walkers and the staff in the shop gives much needed social contact.
Also the support on the Forum is very good and there is no judgement as we all understand how very very hard it is.
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Thank you for reaching out. So much happening at the moment I can’t have the life I had waiting for APPT for STROKE clinic following MRI so worried about outcome/
I tried to join in Have a cuppa yesterday but Email was so late I missed message. I do find it a little hard to navigate the site. Like you my hair was always well cut I wouldn;t gp out without my make up I just shattered all the time I know I have to soldier on.My huband struggles with his Parkinsons but won’t try anything to help himself. Idon;t drive which make getting to meeting difficult.
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Weeman, Your husband’s stubborn refusal to claim benefits means that you are living in poverty, when so much is on offer that you are entitled to.
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We have sorted benefits side of things in place. Its his attitude to accepting his illness and won’t accept any outside help, Which make my job harder.Thankyou for caring.
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@Wee_Man sorry to hear you do not have friends and family close by. Are you in a town or rural area. In our very rural area there is a group of drivers who will take those without cars to places, just cover their petrol?
Also you will have a Parish Council, and I found that they are good to contact in rural community to put you in contact with groups. I joined a bookclub in the village, which really helped meet new people. Does your GP offer support for carers? They may be able to put you in contact with local carers groups. My Carer’s Assessment put in contact with lots of support locally, which is helpful as when you are under all this pressure it saves you doing the looking.
Sending hugs
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Hi Thanks for contacting me my situation is pretty bad at the moment, I am due to attend a Stroke Appt next week my anxiety is so bad I can barely function. We live in a small town in Scotland not a lot of community events. Feel until I get my appointment for Diagnosis I’m stuck. Thanks for the hug x
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@Wee_Man I think once your diagnosis is done you will feel better. You must look after yourself as a priority when your mind is a little clearer. The library is a really good source of local events and support groups.
Reach out when you feel better and you may find lots in the town you are unaware of, hugs