Hi everyone, not sure if there is already a dedicated thread for this - admins - please feel free to move this if there is.
so basically I’m just saying hi, introducing myself. I am soon to become my mom’s main carer so just looking for some advice/tips, any suggestions of essential equipment etc that I may need that you as experienced carers have found helpful. Also just any words of wisdom you may have.
I know it’s going to be a hard slog and going to be extremely difficult/draining at times but I’d like to think I’m ready and up to it. We will be supported by 4x carer visits a day which is going to be hard in itself - so again any tips on how to manage that side of things too would be great.
You’ll find us a friendly bunch with loads of experience and knowledge, so expect others to pop up with a welcome and maybe some questions and then suggestions/advice.
Have you had a Carer’s Assessment done? If not, request one from Local Council - they will probably farm it out to Carer’s Support Centre or the like but it is for YOU not Mum and helps identify YOUR needs.
If she will be having Carers coming in, I am going to guess she has had a Needs Assessment. May I ask if she has been in hospital or a Care Home/Re-enablement Centre?
Do make sure your - and her - GP has you recorded as her Carer. They can often help with additional support and will also ensure you get things like Flu Jabs. If they have Social Prescribers they can get you referred over for other things as well - I got reduced price gym membership til my knee played up!
Others will jump in with advice and suggestions on Benefits. Again, please make sure you apply for everything available as you don’t get told what your entitlement is!!! Hopefully Mum is getting Attendance Allowance, so you may be entitled to Carer’s Allowance, depending on what income you have in your own right.
If you need some impartial advice on this, check with the CarersUK Helpline. They are experts and the website also has a Benefits Checker. All of that is confidential and free advice.
I won’t overburden you now as it’s a lot to take on board. Although you mention “essential equipment” you don’t say what Mum’s health issues are. I don’t want to pry, but what might be suitable depends on how mobile or not she is and particular circumstances. One thing I would do is put requests in for advice / assessments from physios and O.T.s as they can provide equipment and have it installed in the house for you.
Welcome again and good luck.
P.S. This is a wonderful place to vent when things become hard or you get frustrated - we “just get it” so don’t worry - let it out when you need to!! Many of us regulars use the Roll Call thread - which is like a chat over the garden fence - to keep in touch with each other. Have a mooch around and say ‘hello’ on there when you feel comfortable.
Welcome to the forum.
A few quick questions to “set the scene” to start with.
How old is mum? Why does she need so much help?
How is her care being funded?
How old are you, are you giving up work to help mum?
Does mum own or rent her house? Will you be moving in?
Your answers will enable us to help you to negotiate the world of caring.
Feel free to ask us about anything specific.
My mum was very disabled, totally reliant on carers. Sadly some took things belonging to mum. If possible, restrict carers access to some rooms. However, mum remained in her own home for seven years with a lot of help and support.
Hi. Welcome to the forum. My advice is that from word go you schedule in time for yourself to do a hobby, meet friends, anything that you enjoy that will give you a break and take your mind off your caring role. Make sure that only in an emergency that these things don’t happen. Also seek and accept any help you can get. Good luck.