Hi, I’m new! I’ve never been on a forum before so pls bear with me while I navigate.
I am 50 and my husband had a stroke 4.5 years ago. He now has some physical and cognitive disabilities and I have become his caregiver.
Just looking for some people to connect with that can relate to my situation. 
Welcome to the forum. There are others here with experience of your situation. I always start with finances. Money doesn’t make anyone better but can make life a lot easier!
Are you aware of PIP and Council Tax Exemption for those with serious mental issues after a stroke?
@Silentshadow …..hi, welcome to the forum. I’m sorry to hear that your husband had a stroke. It isn’t easy caring at any age let alone when you’re young. My husband had many health issues over a few years and at the age of 60 is now in assisted living after being in a couple of care homes, I’m 56 so can relate to what you’re going through to an extent.
Hi and welcome 
You’re doing just fine.I’m really sorry you’re in this situation. Caring for a spouse after a stroke is something few people truly understand the role changes, the cognitive challenges, and the long-term emotional toll can be incredibly isolating.You’ll find people here who get it, and it’s okay to talk about the hard parts, not just caregiving tasks. Take your time, read along, and share when you’re ready. You’re very welcome here.
Hi @Silentshadow welcome to the forum. I hope you find it supportive and friendly.
Hi @Silentshadow Welcome to the Forum.
My husband, Graham suffered a stroke four years ago today. He began to recover but then his health deteriorated. With a whole host of comorbities, cardiac, respiratory, cancer it became too much for his body to deal with. Initially I did bits and pieces for him but for the last two years I have dealt 24/7. After he died 2 weeks ago my GP told me he could see I was Caring myself into an early grave.
It’s not easy but we do it because of LOVE.
If you haven’t already done so, please check about SMI disregard for Council Tax. I didn’t think we would be able to get it, but I eventually applied and it was backdated three and a half years and we received a refund of over £2500 and no more to pay this year. Your GP just needs to sign the form and enter the date from which he believes your husband reached the point of needing help with things like finances and appointments. It costs nothing to apply, so it’s worth trying - I would speak with GP first if you can and convince him/her that it was a date a LONG time ago! Once the form is signed the Council accept that date.
Please also get a Needs Assessment for your husband and a Carer’s Assessment for you. They cost nothing and you then are “on the radar” for further help should the need arise even if you don’t get anything now. Also, are you registered with your GP as a Carer? If you are, most provide extra support and it also helps as anyone looking at your records knows you are under additional pressure because of that role.
You’ll find the Forum a wealth of knowledge and experience so feel free to ask anything - even if it sounds mundane or “silly”. If you don’t know it, then it isn’t silly!
It’s so important for you to look after yourself, taking some regular time off.
Asking for help isn’t an admission of failure, quite the reverse. It shows you want to care for as long as possible.
Things like a dishwasher, a tumble dryer can save so much time.
Do you have a disability friendly bathroom?
Social Services can arrange an occupational health assessment.
After I was newly widowed, then disabled in a car accident I had to look at everything we used to do. Biggest issue was my half acre garden. My eldest son and I agreed the only solution was to flatten it, even take out the apple trees. Heartbreaking, but it had to be done. Now I have a big patio and my son cuts the grass.