Hi from South Africa

Hi, my name is Pam and I have joined this forum from South Africa as I am here looking after my 94 year old mother in law. She is deaf, blind and now bedridden for the last 4 months. She’s also just started in pads /nappies…about a week or so. I lived in Scotland for 10 years prior to this, and we came back to South Africa because no one else in the family was willing to take her on. She is a delicate bird like tiny woman, who gives the appearance of being a sweet little old lady, but boy o boy, if only they knew…!!! :see_no_evil::see_no_evil::see_no_evil:.

Anyway, she is more than a handful because she lies constantly about everything, and she has disgusting toilet habits, like putting her hands into her dirty pad and smearing it everywhere, then when I get angry she says “did i do that? I can’t remember” and this is a daily, often three times a day occurrence. I am finding it hard to cope with this, especially since I have my own health issues, i.e. fibromyalgia and chronic fatigue. But I’ll chat about her toilet issues as I definitely need advice on how to get her to stop. :frowning:

Hi Alison and welcome,

I would recommend clothing that prevents access to her pad contents so that she can’t then smear them. It depends if she gains access from the top of the pad or from the leg area. I am not endorsing this company but take a look at their garments - these have worked with children with a learning disability with the same issue (and those who eat their nappies.) https://preventawear.com/product-category/onesies/


Thanks Melly1, will have a look. She goes in both ways. I put a belt with a buckle around her pj bottoms today, and so hopefully that will stop her because her hands are quite weak and clumsy!

What a nightmare. Hope the belt works. There are all in one suits rather like a baby’s romper suit. As she goes in via the leg holes too, ones with legs to the knees would be best.