Help! possibly need to seek legal advice

Hi my name is Philip iam 24
I recently applied and received my first carers allowance
I spend 50 hours + carering for my stepmom whi is bed bound with MS
After receiving the first allowance she came out that I have to split the money with her son who is in college 36 hours a week and doesn’t get up until 12 on the weekends
I don’t agree with this as I’m only carering because he can’t be there everyday, otherwise I would be working.
I disagreed and she threatened to call up and have the allowance cancelled and say I’m not actually caring for, a flat out lie
So is this extortion and should I seek legal help
I don’t know what I should do
Any advice is appreciated

It’s more like blackmail than extortion, but that’s not really relevant as any legal costs would far outweigh years worth of Carer’s Allowance.

The obvious answer is to call her bluff: either you get the full Carer’s Allowance or you do no caring.


I agree with Ayjay.


I think I’d tell her to get lost, and not get the money or do the caring.
She’s a nasty piece of work. You are worth more than this.

Hi Philip,

Wishing you a warm welcome to the forum.

I’m sorry to hear about this difficult situation with your stepmother. I would recommend contacting the Carers UK Helpline on on 0808 808 7777 (Monday to Friday, 9am – 6pm) or for advice and a discussion regarding your circumstances.

If you need some time to yourself to take a break from caring and meet other carers, Carers UK are running online weekly meet ups for carers. If this is something you are interested in, you can find more information here: Online meetups | Carers UK.

Best wishes,

Philip are you living in the same property as step Mum.
Do you feel you are doing yourself justice. Providing step Mum help in this way.