Help! Advice needed please

Hi everyone

I am a carer for my husband who has numerous health issues. We decided to sell our house to buy a bungalow which would be beneficial for hubby so he doesnt have to negoatiate the stairs. The bungalow is more expensive than ouf house so im using my inheritance from the sale of my late mother’s property to pay the difference. I am claiming carers allowance and also work just 9 hours a week. My concerns are that when i eventually lose my husband how will i manage financially? My only income will be my small wage from my job. I really dont want to have to move house again. Has anyone been in this situation and how did you cope? I have a small occupational pension from past employment. I am 56 this year so it will be a while before i retire. My husband is 70yrs old.

I am worrying and wondering if we should still go ahead with buying the bungalow?


You have to plan for both your futures. I know it’s difficult when one is already retired. I have this with my husband. He is retired I’m not. Hopefully in another three years. Each of you come from a different place to start. Do you need to leave your current home. Can it not be adapted. If anything should happen before you retire. You could be in a very difficult position. Seeking work in your 60’s.

Thank you for your reply.

The Government want us to work till we drop anyway!! Ive worked out i will have some money spare although not a lot but i can invest it. I hate living here anyway and want to move…have wanted to for a long time. We have viewed cheaper bungalows but always came back to the dearer one as we both like it. If we opted for a cheaper bungalow we would probably always regret not going for our favourite one.

So im still in a dilemma! I contacted a financial advisor who agreed that i could invest the remainder of my inheritance. There is always equity release for when im a widow. So a few options . I just feel if we dont make the move now we never will!


You seem to have the numbers in order. But still sound hesitate!

Is it just finances that is your main concern.

It’s a big decision, you both like the property but what its are holding you back. Who knows what the future holds for at of us. If it seems the right decision for now, don’t wait too long and regret that forever because someone else decided faster!


Well ive not moved yet but we have a pandemic happening so its not surprising! Only thing that has changed is the bungalow we were originally buying has fallen through due to the surveyors report. However, we have found another bungalow this weekend and had our offer accepted.

Yes its the finances that cause me concern. We both want to move but i worry i cant afford the bills when im on my own. I dont have much of a pension either so this is why the finances concern me the most. Guess i should stop worrying and just get on with it cos if i dont i will probably regret not moving!

Thank you all for your replies. Stay safe everyone.


You could go for equity release, or sell and buy a smaller property, or then rent, or rent out a room in your home. If you are going to have building work done, think about this option. If it has a garage, you could rent it out to someone, or convert it into extra space. (I sleep in my own garage, only it’s now a lovely ensuite bedroom, complete with washer dryer).
However, as your husband has high care needs, make sure you are claiming every penny you are entitled to.
Has your husband had his needs assessed by Social Services?
If you have combined savings of under £46,000 they will pay for some of all his care, provided by an agency, or maybe even you.
Is he mentally OK? If not, he might be exempt from Council Tax, for example.

You need to get ready for both your fates. I realize it’s troublesome when one is resigned. I have this with my significant other. He is resigned I’m most certainly not. Ideally in an additional three years. Every one of you originate from a better place to begin. Do you have to leave your present home. Can it not be adjusted. On the off chance that anything ought to occur before you resign.

I think you are being very sensible to consider what will happen when your husband dies.
was widowed suddenly when I was 54, he was 58.

Fortunately I was very well provided for, my husband even in his 20’s was paying into life insurance. I always knew that the large garden he loved would be my biggest problem after he died, what I hadn’t planned for was being involved in a head on smash that disabled me just 3 months to the day after he died.

I know how horrible it all is, but you both need to consider what will happen to both of you if you get ill and cannot care for him any more, and what would happen if you die before him.
Do you have any children? Be VERY careful to arrange the property deal and your will so that the council don’t gobble up all your savings on care home fees at up to £1500 a week. Yes, a week!

Old thread, locked. Usual reasons.