Hello. my name is Maz, I have an adult daughter (28) with autism and moderate learning difficulty. She is in supported living in Cornwall but comes home to Bristol every 4 weeks for about 4 days. There was an incident where she lives and now she doesn’t feel safe and wants to move. We are desperately trying to find somewhere for her but it is so hard to find safe housing in Bristol. I want her to come home really but she wants her own house.
Social services are so slow and we feel very unsupported. . Sorry to start by moaning. Thank you for listening. X
Hi Maz, welcome to the forum.
A former school friend of my son (43) lives in Cornwall, she is in a supported living house called “Our House”.
I’m in Hampshire, it seems to take years before someone is found a place to live now.
My son is in a privately rented flat with carer support, but it’s not idea.
Heya. You might want to consider moving her to a assisted living place for a while. Take a look at some online. I’m in Surrey.
Hi Maz,
if the issue was a safeguarding concern, then social services should be taking it seriously. You don’t need to give details, but did the incident involve another service user (I hate that terminology) or a staff member?
I think it would be difficult for her to return to living at home after having her independence, it’s also likely to mean she is less of a priority to get another place / home of her own.
If its hard to find somewhere suitable in Bristol, are there any places midway between Cornwall and Bristol?
Do the providers who run her current supported living have other homes? Someone else might be looking to swap.
Melly1
Thank you all very much for your replies.
Yes we have reported to adult safeguarding and have escalated as much as possible. We are increasingly concerned as the new manager doesn’t think family should be involved and wont tell us anything. The bit of information we have suggests that she has a very bad diet and is only going out a couple of times a week. She has a mobility car and 2:1 support and needs to be doing something every day. I agree that coming home isnt the best solution but I know I could feed her healthy food and she is happy to go out in the garden etc when at home, we could organise daily activities for her. I cant bear to think of her being so neglected. The company is Salutem. we have tried looking at other places. But I do not think I could trust Salutem again they see to have a strange management set up. I will keep looking and she will be home next week for 6 sleeps so be great to see her and feed her properly. Thank you all for listening. Marion x
Good luck.
I would urge you not to have her home, I know someone else who did this and it took about 15 years before the LA found an alternative placement, only after my friend was diagnosed with cancer.
I’m having real problems with my son too at the moment, the last “annual review” was a joke.
I’m so fed up with it all, my son just needs an interesting life without me (I’m widowed). We used to be “weekend gypsies” going to a different steam show every weekend, husband and son in the lorry with a steam engine on the low loader, me following towing a caravan. My son went to his first weekend rally in a caravan when just 6 weeks old.
Staff take him to a local Wilkinsons on Saturday, boot sale on Sunday. No imagination whatsoever. He’s put on 4 stone in weight, staff recently told me he ate 34 Weetabix in one week!!!
I get that your daughter is an adult and should be able to lead her own private life, however, she is a vulnerable adult and you are her parents, guardians. She has had an incident and doesn’t want to go back, them refusing to give you details and saying that family should not be involved is alarming to say the least. Family should be involved to show there is nothing to hide and to help resolve the issue and her return or relocation.
I would be wondering what they are covering up.
It is very questionable that they won’t impart details to you.
I would want every enquiry available, of which I am not aware, also social services safeguarding and the CQC on the case.
I agree with Breezy, their attitude makes all my “alarm bells” ring.
I wonder if it involves inappropriate behaviour of a member of staff?