Hi, just joined this group and hoping to gather tips and useful resources.
My mum took my 92 year old grandad into her home last year just before lock down 1 began after his neighbours tree partially fell in his garden and after a while he decided he didn’t want to live on his own anymore. Over the last 18 months he has gradually disabled himself by not doing simple things such as getting his breakfast (2 slices of toast) or any drinks. I moved back in with them at the end of last year as I could see my mum starting to struggle. A couple of months ago she was diagnosed with over active thyroid and has been hit hard by the symptoms. My grandad doesn’t seem to care at all that my mum is not well. He makes comments about everything and says he is joking but it really doesn’t sound like it at times. His manners are disgraceful, he refuses to wear his hearing aids so communication is difficult. He says he will help with things but when asked he refuses. My grandad might be 92 but he is reasonably fit and healthy and able to look after his own personal care etc. which is why it is difficult to understand why he seems to want my mum as his personal slave (that’s how she feels half the time). I try to do what I can when not at work such as helping with the house work and washing up etc.
I have worked in social care for many years but I can’t get it through to my grandad that mum isn’t well. He also has these small tantrums where he sits huffing and puffing when he thinks he is being moaned at.
Does anyone have any tips?

He is 92. People of this age are known to lose their appreciation of how much others are doing for them. My mum was the same. What has happened to his old home? Does he have over £23,000 in savings?

Hi Julie

Welcome to the Forum, I hope you are finding it interesting so far.

Just wanted to highlight that we are currently running Forum Focus, an opportunity for Forum users to hear more about Carers UK’s work.

Find all the posts here: https://www.carersuk.org/forum/48