Grief

Good Morning,I lost my beloved Husband in January this year.And hate it Not sleeping well now worried about tummy issues I put it down to ibs.Also I have osteoarthritis of my hips & knees.So have to pace myself.If anyone is from Surrey,I would like too hear from them.Regards Amanda h

Hello Amanda

I am so sorry to read of your husband’s passing. I suspect that your tummy troubles could well be done to IBS brought on by the stress of the last few months - please do make an appointment with your GP as there are medications that will most certainly help. In the meantime try and be kind to yourself, take it easier now that caring has ended.

Have you thought of contacting one of the groups providing widowed support ?
there is Way Up - here https://way-up.co.uk/
and Cruse here Home - Cruse Bereavement Support
Cruse have local support groups so they may have one in your are - you can check here https://www.cruse.org.uk/get-support/contact-your-local-branch/

Hi Amanda,

It takes a very, very long time to work through grief. There is very little you can do to make it easier, I tried everything.

In the meantime, go back to your GP, and ask him for something gentle to help you relax and sleep.
Mine gave me Amitryptilene,
I only took half a pill, otherwise I would be sound asleep all day. Looking back, that was only the sleep my body had lost that it desperately needed.
Make a determined effort to give yourself a “holiday at home” for a week. Minimal housework, stay in bed and read a book, go for walks, a meal out, meander round garden centres, and be very aware of how you are feeling. It won’t help you grief much but should help your general well being.
I found a book by Sarah Litvinoff called “Starting Again” helpful. There are little ideas to make you think how to build the rest of your life.

Amanda
I’m very sorry to hear of your husband’s passing. It’s a very difficult time but you do learn to adjust. Takes time, as I have discovered.
I too have had tummy troubles. It really is worth the effort to go to your GP. Found out I am vitamin D deficient. It could be something simple for you too.
It’s one day at a time, and tiny achievements to start with help. Early days for you

Hello Everyone, Well the Cuppathon yesterday was amazing I really felt uplifted I am still struggling but not rushing into anything.Thank you again & so sorry not to have replied a lot sooner.Best wishes Amanda

I forgot to mention an online forum called Way Up for widows over 50. Be sure to join, and you will see that others at your stage of grief are experiencing the same feelings. I went to a weekend in Bath organised by them , a few years ago.