I’m now a former carer as my grandma has passed away today from her vascular dementia. In the final weeks she began having seizures and lost the ability to walk and was sleeping most of the day. On her 91st birthday she had another seizure and passed away in hospital the next morning. I can’t fault the NHS for the end of life care they provided.
My mum and I were grandma’s carers for 13 years. I was 19 when I started caring and I’m almost 33 now. Despite the bereavement I don’t feel much different though that’s probably the shock talking. Caring was incredibly difficult at times but I am very glad that my mum and I made grandma comfortable for as long as we did.
You and your mum did an amazing job, feel so proud of the love and care you gave her.
As a widow, I know how tough the next year will be, as you both grieve and recover. Take today to sit quietly, go for a walk, have a nap, before the formalities of a death start. Forget about anything else until the funeral is over. This is a forum for former, as well as current carers. Feel free to ask for our support whenever you need it.
Sorry for your loss. When you’ve become a long time carer, it’s difficult to move on (until recently, I’ve been a carer for 30+yrs). At least you were there until the end.
Hi @jjarichardson as someone recently widowed I know what the loss of a caree can make you feel. I am fortunate to have some amazing friends and neighbours who are helping me through it all. The saying ‘be kind to yourself’ is so often used, but try to give yourself the odd treat and think how much Grandma would have enjoyed seeing you taking pleasure in it. No words can really help, but this Forum is a place of AMAZING support and empathy and everyone will be here for you whenever you need to vent or just to chat about nothing in particular. We “just get it”…
to you and your family.