@LesleyDawn83 I’m excited for you. ‘You go hon!’. Also, just to say that anyone learning something new feels discomfort so there will be many others feeling like you do too. So I’m hoping you can make some friendly connections for support. You’re stepping into discomfort and it’s scary…but also very human and natural. The gift you are giving to yourself is being brave and curious Despite the fear, and your Mum. Good for you!!!
@Timothy_1507 depending on the type of dementia all sorts of thinking AND behavior are rewired, as many of us have experienced. What’s said/done in front of people and what happens after they’ve gone can also be very different. Dad used to use all his energy (as a proud highly intelligent ex-doctor) to demonstrate how ‘well’ he was in front of the GP / family - thankfully our GP was wise to his ways but some relatives felt entitled to tell us how to care for Dad or even worse what we were doing wrong.
I wanted to share this because, and I hope you don’t mind me suggesting this, whilst dementia is a cause for your Mum’s behavior, I wouldn’t use it as an excuse, or reason to explain away the hurt your sister may feel by her ‘rudeness’. I was lucky because when we cared for Dad, Mum and I would sit up together after he was in bed, and talk through ‘stuff’. Acknowledging how awful and hurtful some things were enabled us to keep going together. We were lucky to have each other caring for Dad.
Long reply to a short comment! If you’re observing the behavior happen can you chat with your sister about it? Of course, I know nothing of your situation, but your comment just struck a chord.
@Chris_22081 Agree totally! It’s also why, I’ve set hard boundaries with some relatives - a couple fell hard from high pedestals. Disappointment is a hard pill to swallow. Entitlement, egos & lack of empathy; a bad combination.
