Caring for a daughter with Mental Health problems

Not sure if any one can help but would be lovely to get some support. My 32 year old daughter had been living with my partner and myself for the past 14 months. She has been diagnosed with; Complex PTSD, ME and BPD. I believe I am probably BPD as well. My daughter says everything is my fault, I have ruined her life as I was a poor mother, being emotionally detatched. She experiences great rage that frightenes me, and thretenes to kill herself, or me periodically. She is having a relly tought time, isolated in the countryside in the middle of France. I have lost my way and don’t know if my caring for her is in fact helping her or compounding her issues. She should not really be living with me, too hard for her, but due to the ME she is unable to look after herself. I would like some help to explore my caring role, my understanding of her issues, and a positive way forward for both of us. Thanks

Hi & Welcome Bridget

So sorry for the current situation you find yourself in.

Although this is UK have a look through the site there is a lot of information that maybe of help.
There should alternative charities and organisations in France.

Your daughter is angry and you are the person who is the closest to her. Has your daughter every had counselling sessions. If not either she could have sessions on her own or you could have joint sessions. Your daughter is an adult and not a child and is responsible for her own actions. You are not her go too problem solver you are her mother.

Even if there was some gene connections that doesn’t mean your daughter has to constantly remind you.

You are human and have your own needs and it’s totally unfair to be constantly subjected to reminders of guilt.