Hi, I’m a mum of three, now aged 22 24& 26. Two have life changing disabilities and one not so severe (genetic conditions that didn’t manifest until their early teens, when all-hell let loose). I’m really struggling with burn-out and feel I might be having a mental breakdown. Is there anywhere that provides counselling at low cost as I’m really struggling - but money is really tight. We’ve never had any support as parents and I think it’s all caught up with me over the last two years 
Hi & welcome Karen
What a lot you have on your plate. Is there reasons you have not seek support for yourself and your children. As there is support if you are open to excepting it. Getting help for all of you will help as a family.
There is access to a needs assessment. And a carers assessment where you may be able to access counselling.
https://www.carersuk.org/help-and-advice/practical-support/getting-care-and-support/needs-assessment
I think you might benefit from a local carers group.
https://www.carersuk.org/help-and-advice/get-support/local-support
Where there will be staff and volunteers. Who will know some of your issues of being a carer.
Some carers groups provide access to activities etc.
When did you last have a Carers Assessment?
I now have counselling as part of my carers package. Mind you, it took about 35 years for the LA to acknowledge that caring was having a toll on my health!
Thanks for your advice x I did have a carers assessment a few years ago but was told there was nothing available here in rural Sussex . We also tried to get support for our kids through the years, but again there was nothing. It seems that unless it is addiction or an eating disorder in your people, nothing was available - despite referrals for mental health support to help them also cope with what was happening to them. We had a dreadful five year battle, and so many consultants said it was all in their head. Turns out it is a very rare condition and all are now part of the genome project.
Anyway, it sounds like affordable counselling is probably not ‘a thing’ and the NHS waiting list is around 27 months for me, so I will have to ‘man up’ and do my best. Thanks anyway! X
I don’t think you have quite understood what I said.
You are entitled to a Carers Assessment, quite different from a Needs Assessment for your children.
It should be blindingly obvious to anyone with half a brain that with not just one but three children with special needs, you are struggling!
I’m in the New Forest, very little here in the way of support when M was growing up. They thought it was OK for me to drive 20 miles to a respite centre, then home 20 miles, and again in the evening, 80 miles for 6 hours respite really is ridiculous, and since they’d all be done in rush hours, each journey might take up to an hour.
Have you ever thought about all three of your children moving into supported living, a standalone service for them, just them?
I can see why you would feel the system of help hasn’t been there for you.
But I would still like has been said. Follow up on a carers assessment for you.
This could be a potential gateway for funding your required counselling.
Maybe it’s time to talk to your doctor.
Mine wrote to Social Services and told them to sort things out for M so I can retire.
Hello Karen and welcome to our forum, I’m sorry to hear you’re having a difficult time, a lot of carers are really struggling at the moment for all sorts of reasons. I see other carers have posted various links to our help and advice pages, please check out the pages. I’m also attaching a couple of links for meet up groups we’re running, many of our carers have said how helpful and supportive they found them. Please come along if you feel you would like to, its a great way to meet other carers and there’s no pressure to share anything.
We have two groups, the first is a weekly care for a cuppa session, it runs every Monday at 3pm for about an hour, where carers come together, talk and share tips Online meetups | Carers UK
We also have a weekly share and learn session Share and Learn | Carers UK they’re a series of fun and relaxing sessions we’re running on all sorts of topics from yoga, singing to talks and dance classes.
We would love to see you there
with all good wishes
Ingrid