My husband lives with rheumatoid arthritis after being diagnosed 4/5 years ago and while I’ve been with him to tons of appointments with various professionals I’ve only just stumbled upon the information that rheumatoid arthritis shortens your life span by 10-15 years.
I’m just processing this information and feel like an idiot for not realising (or asking) sooner how much this condition will affect our lives more and more in the future, and ultimately steal time from us at the end of our lives. We’re still young, just in our 30s, and I feel like I’m only just coming to terms with what this disease could mean for us. I know that nothing in life is certain, but it makes me feel like I’ve lost a different kind of life. It makes me want to seize opportunities in life, to live it to its fullest. But while I feel like this, my husband is just dealing with and enduring the pain, discomfort and low mood that the condition brings. It feels like he’s just getting through the days and I find myself getting angry at the time we’re losing.
Any advice on balancing empathy with what your caree is experiencing with your own hopes and dreams?
(I should say, I’ve titled this unofficial carer on the basis that my husband works full time, so doesn’t typically depend on me financially. Though, hilariously, he’s not working right now after quitting his second job on the last year… I guess I’m saying I feel like a carer even though I don’t fit the government bill for being one)