Please help with further advice

Hi all,

I posted a couple of weeks ago to ask about our entitlement to a care plan for my elderly relly who is on the cusp of being discharged from hospital. Thank you again to all who helped.

My sister and I have LPA - both types. Our relative has dementia and I think we all agree that ATM she doesn’t have capacity. It’s therefore our role to speak for her.

The plan was that she would go to a rehabiliation place initially, but yesterday I was told by the Occupational Therapist (who seems to be the only person from the hospital who contacts us) that the rehab’ places have rejected my relative. They say she would need to self-isolate in own room for 2 weeks on entry, and they say she wouldn’t be able to press a bell to ask for toileting. It’s not clear to me that she can’t press a bell, but even if she can’t I don’t understand why they coulnd’t simply ask her during routine checks. She wears pads all the time.

Anyway, I asked yesterday for BI meeting and was told yes, and it would be tomorrow (Friday). Have just had another call and they’ve told me they feel they don’t need a BI meeting as it wouldn’t make any difference (i.e. as I read that, they’re not willing to consider what we say, which is why it wouldn’t make any difference).

They’ve said another few interesting things.

  1. They say they (ward staff) have written her down as having Nursing needs i.e. rather than simply residential home needs. I asked what those nursing needs are, as I’m not aware of any, and because that might well be why the rehab places have rejected her, as they have no qualified nursing staff. The OT told me I’d need to discuss that with nursing staff. I pointed out I can’t as she is denying us a meeting. She then said the Matron will ring me later today.

  2. I asked if my relly will be entitled to Continuing Healthcare funding (or wahtever it is called) since they insist she has nursing needs. OT didn’t feel qualified to answer.

Can anyone advise? Help? I don’t know whether to try to press for a meeting. I’m sure we must be entitled to one, and I want to do the best for my relative, but I don’t know waht to point to to say we’re entitled.

I know ward sent written summary to rehab places. I’d like to see a copy - what have they said generally, and what have they said about nursing needs? Am I entitled to copy? I feel I must be (LPA) but perhaps I’m wrong.

My sister and I feel we’re just sinking in this. If anybody can offer any help I would be so grateful.

Hi there

Sorry to hear you are struggling to get to the bottom of this.

Our helpline may be able to assist you with your query, do contact them on:

0808 808 7777 from Monday to Friday, 9am – 6pm or by email

Best wishes


Thanks Ingrid - trying now.

Edited to say: I did get through, but unfortunately as I was explaining I was cut off. I’m trying again, and will try again in the morning if I can’t get through again this evening.

Thanks again for helping, @Ingrid Carers Uk - I can’t tell you how much I appreciate it. We feel completely helpless.

Further edit: I did get through again, and once again the call was cut off while we were speaking :frowning:

Perhaps this is because it’s the end of the day and people are tired of hearing complicated stories.

As you have POA, make a “Subject Access Request” to the hospital, enclosing a copy of the POA, and say you want copies of EVERYTHING on mum’s file URGENTLY. Look at the Information Commissioner’s website for more info.

Thanks Bowlingbun.


My mum was in and out of hospital over a 10 year period. Such an incredibly stressful experience for us. In the end when she had another mini stroke, she refused to go back to Royal Bournemouth Hospital again. It was awful. Mum was always very particular about her hygiene at home. She was there for 3 months but never had a bath once, they didn’t have an accessible bath!! She used a bath seat every day at home. I asked nursing staff to wash her hair, it took nearly a week! She had a home hairdresser to always look nice at home. So incredibly sad.

I’m so sorry to hear that, but sadly not surprised. Sister and I had nightmare that lasted about 10 years with our father (vascular dementia), in ‘homes’.