My husband died in a care home during the first lockdown. His death was not covid related but due to the lockdown I only had minimal visits with him right at the very end of his life. This continues to be a real problem for me as I feel I cannot process his death. I do not feel I have the full story about what happened during all those weeks of lockdown when I could not visit. I am not blaming the home for any lack of care. I just don’t understand how he went from being his usual self, when I left him in the middle of March, to the poor man I saw twelve weeks later when I was finally allowed to see him at the window.
Twice I have asked the home for his notes, including requests in writing as well as speaking to them on the phone. Basically I am being ignored. I know it’s difficult in care homes right now and I feel bad about making an issue of this. I don’t think I will ever have so-called ‘closure’ because the circumstances of his death were so difficult for the whole family. I just don’t know what to do for the best. Thank you for any thoughts or further suggestions.