Nursing Home

Hi All

My mother is bed bound and apart from that has her faculties (she’s 88) and is in a nursing home for 2 years. The building has been refurbished a few years before she moved in so it’s bright and lovely and cheerful. She’s no longer happy there she says because staff are noisy especially the night staff, who would laugh out loud or all talking at the same time, and many times she would jump in her sleep because of it. Agency staff seem to be mostly the culprits. Some of the nurses are impatient if she’s too slow moving when assisted out of her bed so they can make it up. Another complaint was that she doesn’t always get a wash every day and could be weeks to have a bath. Don’t get me wrong she doesn’t smell or anything it’s just these don’t happen on a regular basis. Some staff can be rude and a bit sharp. Others have an attitude as if they don’t want to be there and is annoyed they had to come to work. At first she didn’t want any complaints for fear that they might be worse and annoyed that she complained, but at one stage she herself had to tell the worker off of the way she was spoken too, and reminded them that she too was in the same profession many years ago and would never dream of speaking to a patient this way. She will stick up for herself if pushed. Sometimes she has other people’s clothes on even though hers are marked and label, and when telling the nurse it’s not hers, she would get the answer…I haven’t time to change that now, I’ll do it later, of course it doesn’t always happen because when the nurse finishes her shift, she’s forgotten… Mum cannot take her tops off etc as she cannot raise her arms up fully because lack of exercise and muscle loss.

A family friend who works in a different nursing home explained to me that most working homes have to problem of patients not being washed/bathed on a regular basis because one nurse/carer can have between 5-7 patients to look after before their shift finishes so they don’t always get the chance to have a daily wash. :frowning:

She asked if it’s possible for her to go somewhere else, so wondering if its too involved, it was a bit of a nightmare getting her in a home because of some of the things mentioned; it’s terrible to get hold of a SW, messages dont get answered or you’re put through to wrong depts and wrong info given. She pays some fees and council contributes. Just wondered if anyone experienced this and throw a few ideas/suggestions. Many thanks in advance.

First stop, talk to the Care Quality Commission.

Have a look at the home care current rating.

She’s no longer happy there As your Mum has stated this I would be inclined to made inquiries elsewhere.

Sadly, some people can never be pleased. I went to a relatives and residents meeting at mum’s home, which was very good indeed. Some of the residents were incredible nit pickers. I knew how good the food was, afternoon tea even for residents in their rooms was full of delicacies to tempt them. The staff were excellent, always had time for me. I felt sorry for the staff being so harshly criticised at the meeting!

In my opinion forget the CQC and just look at other homes and get your Mum moved. The CQC didn’t listen to my complaints about the home my Mum was in for 8 months where they were nasty to her. Where she was given inadequate food. The CQC inspection took place while I was there and they asked if they could speak to us. Mum clearly told the inspector that she didn’t get enough food and the woman said “you must never be hungry. Just ask for some more.” I had to explain to her that the cook (who I personally knew) made just enough for the number of residents and there was never enough for seconds or larger portions. When the report came out there was no mention whatsoever about our conversation and it said residents were generally happy with the food provided.

They also wouldn’t listen to my friend’s complaints. Her Mum was neglected, starving hungry, not given her medication in a different home. Her Mum managed to get outside and was trapped in the bars of a fence and the staff hadn’t even missed her until my friend arrived and couldn’t find her!

I looked at 14 homes before I moved my Mum and she has now been there 3 years and not once have I had to complain. She is wonderfully looked after and loved by all the staff.

If your Mum says she is unhappy then she really is and you need to find somewhere else. Does your local council do an online list of homes and vacancies in your area?

Maybe it would be better to hire someone to take care of her at home? I’m sure there are many agencies like this.


Why not? As mentioned before, because in nurse homes are many patients, some people don’t receive the care and attention they need. It is better to take someone at home to take care of the sick person, where he/she will feel better because it’s his/her comfort zone. It’s easier to cook for the person, wash them when they need to, etc.
Many agencies offer such services. You just have to make a little effort and look for a good one in your area, like the Cincinnati home care.
I agree that it is difficult to receive a stranger in the house to take care of a sick person who can’t defend himself, but try to make some effort.