Hi Everyone, my mother is 84 and has, over the last 3 years, lost most of her mobility, it started with drop foot and now she can barely move 1 leg. She has been under investigation by a neurology department for the last 18 months but they have not been able to come up with a specific diagnosis. They identified a bone spur on her spine and she had an operation in May. Unfortunatly due to covid the care she had after the op was negligible, Physio very limited and via phone, OT via phone, the OTs simply asked what she wanted rather than making any assessments about what she might need, and of course in true WW2 spirit she told them she was fine. Since then I have moved her to sheltered accommodation near me am beginning to care for her. I have organised private Physio, but her walking is getting worse and worse, she gets stressed and tearful when its difficult, and Im not sure if I am doing the right thing. Should I be encouraging the physio, getting her to walk regularly and doing the exercises? or should we all accept she is immobile and just make life as nice as possible? The Physio is positive and says she is doing well, but I kind of feel thats their job. She has only been going for about 3 weeks so far. All the doctors seem only concerned with their speciality, the neurologist is looking to solve the neurological problem, the spinal department are happy that the operation was successful. The GPs wont see her in person, its all over the phone and she is new to the practice. Mentally she is fine, a bit forgetful and small things cause stress but by and large she is fine. She has lived alone for over 15 years and is quite independent.
My main question is should I continue pushing her to walk or accept her immobility and make life as pleasant as possible? where and how can I get a holistic assessment?
Thank you for any suggestions
Nix
It’s important to keep as mobile as possible. That’s not to say we need to do a marathon. Keep moving can just been. Getting on from a chair regularly. Some older people can become sedentary. Then it’s more difficult to get moving. There are many exercise than can be done in a chair. It’s important for people to stand up every hour. They can forget having watched a TV program. Get a timer to remind to stand and move a little. A walker with a seat is a good idea. As it gives the user confidence. And should feel more encouraged to walk. There are new style walkers which look more modern. I use one as I get a nerve spasm in my neck. And the walker allows me to keep walking. Otherwise I would be scared I might fall and I don’t need to reply on another person etc. Mother does need to feel she is in charge - it’s her life after all. So an amount of coaxing may be needed.
What does mum say?
It’s difficult watching a parent decline. My mum was OK, not wonderful, it able to manage on her own until she fell as broke her leg when she was 80. Her last seven years were so sad, urinary infections, a Zimmer frame, catheterised, hospitalised a number of times,sepsis and finally residential care, unable to do anything for herself. Her body was time expired. Nothing you can say or do can halt the passage of time, it may be that your mums body is no longer strong enough to manage to get well again.
Concentrate on her being comfortable. If she can afford private physio, it will certainly help work out what can realistically be achieved, with regular sessions, but be prepared for disappointment.
Thanks for your insights