I’m not sure if this is the right place to post this so apologies in advance, I’m just feeling really overwhelmed & need some advice.
Mum is 74 & up until April this year was completely independent. I live with her, but she drives, does most of her shopping, cooking, housework- I guess if anything, she’s more like my carer! In April this year she started to suffer with severe hip pain which the GP prescribed her painkillers for. She was also referred for community physio. Several weeks go on & the pain was getting worse along with Mum’s mobility- to the extent she could no longer get upstairs or even get out of the house. The GP just kept telling her to carry on with the painkillers, physio told her there was nothing else they could do for her except tell her to carry on with the exercises they gave her- apparently her inability to climb stairs was due to anxiety & they couldn’t help! Eventually at the end of July I persuaded Mum to go to hospital for the pain, where the ward pretty much left her in a bed for 4 weeks. She had a scan after a week which revealed muscle damage- in the doctor’s words, she needed ‘painkillers & lots of physio’. She had very little physio whilst she was in, they barely managed to control her pain & so she was discharged to a rehab place after a month in just as much pain & unable to walk or even stand after being in bed for so long.
Rehab are now sending her home- she has managed to progress to being able to stand using a rotunda with the help from carers & get into a wheelchair; they say the next step is using a frame but don’t think she’s ready for it yet. They want to send her home this week with care visits 4x a day, she will be referred for community physio but they’re unable to tell us how long she’ll have to wait for this & based on her past experience, I’m not very hopeful on how much use they’ll be. When mum broke her leg a few years back, she had intensive physio 3x a week at our local hospital, including hydrotherapy & using their gym. This time, there’s nothing. It’s basically ‘this is your life now, get used to it.’ This has completely turned both of our lives upside down & I just don’t know where else to turn to try & get Mum some help. She is desperate to get back on her feet & have some sort of normal life again, but everywhere we go the door is just slammed in our face. I work full time & tbh I am terrified of Mum being at home in the condition she is. No one has properly discussed with either of us what happens when the free care period ends or what help Mum might be entitled to. We don’t even know how it works with regards to carers coming in- what times, what do they do etc. We both just feel completely overwhelmed & at a loss what to do or where to go for help. Apologies for such a long post!