Lewy Body , Help needed

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Hello,
My Father in-law had Lewy body Dementia. I looked after him for 8 years before he died 7 years ago at the age of 80. We believe he had been showing symptoms for 20 years.

My self and my husband looked after him with very little help and as you can imagine good days and bad. It was hard work but we gave him the best care we could.

My concern, I am now worried about my husband. He is 60 years old and is showing very similar signs to his Dad. They were very similar Strong characters so I am not sure if what I am seeing is him or the start of something. There is no memory loss or any of the common things you associate with early L B.

More personality changes, anger, frustration and tiredness. We actually went out for diner with friends this week where he decided to shout at me at the table. My friends were a little shocked. When we got home I was obviously very upset and asked him why he did this. He said he didn’t and that I was spoiling a good evening. He has since said sorry but I know he doesn’t even know what he is saying sorry for. He is getting very bad R.E.M and doesn’t sleep well. He was diagnosed with Diabetes 2 a year ago and blames this for every outburst or aggression. He is loving and a great father but he is very up and down, big highs or Lows. He is very opinionated and this seems to be getting worse. He seems not to give people personal space and can be very sexually and politically incorrect. This is all words and not actions. He has also started to get a runny nose which I know can be something associated with L.B. I am looking for the very first signs of LB.His driving has also changed with aggression and gets angry with other drivers.
I am starting to make excuses for him around friends and family.

I have spoken to him about this and he tells me he has always been like this and maybe it’s me that has changed. He would not see a doctor as he would never agree to that.

I am so worried and not sure what I can do.

Any advice would be gratefully appreciated
Regards,
Kate

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Katie, I’m sad to read your post. I spotted the early signs of dementia in my sister in-law at least 4 years before diagnosis as I had seen my lovely mum in law develop the illness years before.
You would not have written your post unless you were sure in your heart. It is the difference in the behaviour that is significant. It took several visits to the GP before concerns were taken seriously in my SIL’s case.
Can you keep a secret diary of unusual behaviour?
In the meantime make sure you both do a Power of Attorney saying you heard something on TV or similar that it was a good idea. Do you know enough about your financial situation, savings pensions etc. Does he have health insurance, Critical Illness cover? Do you still have a mortgage? Is there anyone else you can confide in?

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Thank you so much for getting back to me.

A diary is a fantastic idea, it was very hard remembering and convincing both family, friends and doctors. With this information it will help with the facts and showing them. Its so hard letting someone know they have changed when they disagree with you.


All legal side of things sorted.

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Good the legal stuff is done. Keep in touch.