He wants to work as in computer industry (fixing computers)

Dear Sir/Madam,

My son is 26 years old and has autism with learning difficulties. He was at two different residential settings in the space of 12 years, however the transition afterwards was not smooth. He moved back home in 2017, and for a year we didn’t receive any support. Since this time we are struggling to get the right support for him. We are getting 15 hours a week from the council now, however the support workers that we are getting are not fully qualified in working with autistic people. My family and I are struggling to handle his day to day issues such as hygiene and him getting the correct nutrition. Since the first lockdown in 2020, he has lost the confidence to go out often. Also, since this time, he has also grown an unhealthy obsession of astrology and Tarot cards. He calls different “astrologers” around the world, who are usually scammers taking advantage of him being vulnerable and using it as easy money.

He has been talking to a tarot card reader for three days and she said that he will receive a message from his “soul mate” etc. This obviously did not happen and now Rahul believes that they “did not do the right spell”. Now he is more frustrated. I am sick worried that this “astrologer” has threatened my son somehow and I am worried about his mental health due to this. If we refuse to give him the money to pay these “psychics” he throws big tantrums which effect the family.

The social worker we have is aware of all these issues and came to do a review in September, however, even after sending multiple emails, from Rahul’s councillor and support workers side, we have not received any report or support. I would like this sorted before it gets too late. I would really appreciate your support.

Thank you,

Raxa Kanabar

Sent from my Galaxy

Sent from my Galaxy

Hello Raxa and welcome. It is a big worry isn’t it having autism and Learning difficulties, my adult daughter is the same. She is SO trusting and doesn’t understand the value of money either so I constantly worry about her being conned. When I give her her money I give it in £10 notes or fivers so that she is less likely to be given the wrong change.

There have been times when she has run up massive bills on her mobile phone ringing daft numbers but I think that has stopped now.

It is really difficult convincing them that not all people are honest and not all people are like us but I think you need to really try to get through to your son that this tarot card reader only wants his money.

I looked into getting my daughter an account where she had free access to a certain amount of money but some had bad reviews so we just carry on as we are for now. She sometimes says “it’s my money and I can do what I like” and she gets very cross but when I point out to her that she always has money in her bank and when she needs it she can use it but if she wastes it all then there will be none left. She usually has £50 in her purse as spending money which i think is plenty. I would never dare let her have her cash card though!

Hello Raxa. Firstly, I recommend you put a strict limit on how much money you give your son, and don’t run scared of his tantrums. Otherwise the demands from these scammers will be ever increasing.

In the title of your post you say he wants to work in the computer industry, but you say nothing about this in the body of your post. Can you say a little more about this? Does he show a strong interest in this area? Has he made any attempts to get a job doing this or anything else.

If you can find any sort of opening that will lead him in this direction I suggest you encourage him. Even some sort of computer related club could help. It will take his mind away from following the astrology rubbish.

People with autism are often very focused in a specialised field. If his focus is computers then there could be a future. His lack of social skills need not be a major handicap; the computer industry is not known for outgoing personalities.