After a few years of slow decline which speeded up during COVID my mum has finally been diagnosed with dementia and Alzheimer’s. She scored 68/100 in her test, ten months ago it was 82/100. I’m trying to process it in my mind and work out what happens next for her and for me without rushing too much. Mum has seemingly declined since the diagnosis which was only a few days ago, it’s almost as if she’s accepted it now and stopped trying to pretend she’s okay - is that something which happens?
She has just started having carers twice a week (is self funding) and I visit weekly (work full time and live a 40 minute drive away). I am an only child, as is she, and my dad/her husband died nearly ten years ago.
I know I should start to fill in the Attendance Allowance forms and that she can claim Council Tax Exemption. Is there anything else I should do as a matter or urgency please?
Does mum own her house, or rent?
Does she share her financial information with you?
Is it all in one place?
The less stuff there is in the house the easier it will be to manage in future.
Bungalow or house?
From now on, the more outside help mum accepts the longer she will be able to stay in her house.
Does she have a dishwasher and tumble dryer?
Is the garden easy to manage?
These are just ideas to consider for mum’s long term wellbeing.
House is owned.
I have lpa for finance which I enacted earlier this year, she doesn’t understand money very well now. She will be self funding and I’m paying for the carers (she won’t understand any of this).
I can find all the financial stuff easily.
Mum likes the Victorian age therefore the house is full of china and niknaks.
Three storey house, bathroom and bedroom on middle floor, stair lift in place for years.
She washes up dishes by hand.
She won’t use her tumbledrier as she thinks it will overflow and flood the house (it won’t, but, dementia…)
No outside space at all.
Getting her to accept carers has taken a few years but now they’ve started I th8 k she will continue to deal with it. Unfortunately for her but it has helped me she had a fall before Christmas and lay on the floor for 20 hours before I found her. She had her wrist press alarm on but didn’t press it. She was unhurt but had a couple of nights in hospital and it highlighted again to the nhs that she is declining, an OT came out and was brill and that has got the ball rolling.
Friends of mine in Germany bought an overcomplicated alarm device for their mother, but it didn’t work. It was supposed to phone round all three of them in turn till one answered. They returned it by post and it immediately reported to all three that there had been a fall.