This is just me venting so no need to respond & it will probably be long.
It’s 6am & I haven’t been to bed yet .
Daughter haS had problems with benefits. Seems to have been sorted in last few days, phone calls & texts, but no letter of confirmation yet so she is panicking.
Been a really rough few days. Hours of waiting on the phone to DWP, her panicking, dad needing help & daughter just won’t leave me alone. I can’t go 30 minutes without her telling me everything that is going on with her body or needing me to do something.
But you know what bothers me the most? Her constant complaints that what I do for her is not right or good enough. Sorry, we ‘talked’ about this today & she said it’s not complaints, it’s criticism & I should be able to accept criticism. What?!?! When I mentioned it days ago & she asked what I expect, I said I expect her to say thank you & eat her food or not, she said that is not normal.
I cook for her 2 to 3 times a day. Every time she will tell me what is wrong with her food & question if it’s ok & safe to eat. She has scrambled eggs & toast every afternoon & every afternoon she ‘criticises’. Mostly because she ‘needs’ it to be exactly the same every time.
I make her evening meal every night. I hate doing it. We’re now at the point where it’s the same thing most nights. Thing is, she doesn’t want to eat until 8 or 9 pm, or even later. So I’ve kind of made something for myself & then have to start again. And by the time she’s finished, getting more an hour or so later, I’m too tired to clear up. This means every morning I’m faced with a pile of washing up. I hate it.
Tonight, like many nights, she has given me a tirade of abuse & accusations. “I shouldn’t have had her if I can’t cope with her.” I don’t care about her, I do nothing to support her, (mostly emotionally), I am vile & horrible etc, etc.
She also complained I drink too much. She’s right, I do, now. But when she wasn’t living here I didn’t. She said I’m horrible when I’ve had a drink. I’m not horrible, but maybe say things I would normally keep inside. Trust me, there’s lots I don’t say. But even though she’s saying this & says she knows it’s not a good time to talk to me, & I’ve said it’s not a good time, she sits down & has a go at me for an hour. An hour of someone telling you you’re not good enough, you’re vile & say disgusting hurtful things, when you’re just trying to get through each day saying as little as possible so you don’t provoke a reaction.
I desperately need some time to myself. When I have some time alone I am so much more able to deal with her & help her. Being ‘available ‘ 24/7 is killing me.
Anyway, got that out of my system. Now 7am, hopefully bed soon.
Thanks
X