What to do when u cant take anymore?

New to Carers Connect
1

Hi

My stepdad lost his eyesight and short term memory aftet hospital surgery. He was poorly with poorly heart, but managing independent living, skilled photographer, bowls player.
Without warning he became black blind, and has been for the last three decades.
He remains a truly lovely man, and he does his best to help us and the carers, who visit x3 daily.
The amount of care he needs is crippling mum and me.
Poor man has to have everything done for him, he cannot walk unaided, eat independently and all personal care is provided.
This former great man has become a shell.
Also recently diagnosed with vascular dementia.
First decade was horrendous, second decade i was busy having children, tried to
Help when could. These last five years have been getting harder and harder. Its just torturous in every way, seeing this wonderful suffer and then trying to keep him well. When will it end?

2

It’s now absolutely vital that you get outside help, because dad’s needs are now going to escalate sharply now. It’s so important to realise that it’s not just our parents, but us, who are getting older, and lack of stamina is now my biggest enemy at the age of 67.
Did you know dad is now exempt from Council Tax as he has dementia?
Ask Social Services for a Needs Assessment, and a Carers Assessment.
Make sure you are there when the needs assessment is done.
Make sure you are on your own, away from their home, when yours is done.