What do I do. My husband (age 63) broke his foot in November and has been bed bound ever since, in a hospital bed in our living room. The hospital consultant confirmed his foot is healed nicely. But from being in bed for so long, his mobility is shot – it wasn’t great to begin with.
Physios have been to the house and have said he needs to do exercises to get the mobility back. I hired carers to come to the house and move him from the bed to a chair via a hoist, and then back to the bed again. While in the chair I make him do his exercises (he won’t do them otherwise). Since April we have spent thousands of pounds on carers. The physios tried everything to get him to stand but have exhausted all options. So they said it’s over to us now. All I can do is to get him to keep doing his leg exercises. When he gets to the point where I think he can stand, they said to call them.
He’s in denial about his condition, frankly I’m wondering if he’s developing dementia (his mum had this). Tonight he said, “I’m coming upstairs to bed tonight” (we have a stair lift). But he can’t even sit up. It’s like he doesn’t recognise the seriousness of his condition. I know he can’t do it but I’ll humour him, because if I try and tell him he’s not well enough yet, he’ll say I’m being negative. We also have some people coming over in July for a gathering and he said “I have a lot to do in the kitchen for that party” yet I’m the one doing all the cooking because (before this accident happened) he couldn’t stand long enough in the kitchen to do any cooking.
Either he’s in complete denial about his condition or something else is going on mentally where he’s not understanding the seriousness of his condition.
Hi @Butterfly23, welcome to the forum. I would suggest contacting the 111 service and see if a out of hours GP or a 1st responser or district nurse comes and do a check on your husband. If you can’t get any joy over the weekend speak to the GPS and ask for a home visit. It sounds like he needs more support and help.
Why was his mobility poor and his ability to stand so short before the accident?
Staying in bed all those months - no wonder he is so weak.
It sounds like you are doing all you can. He needs to be doing the exercises at intervals throughout the day if he is to have any hope of standing again let alone walking.
He certainly sounds like he is in denial. His chosen lifestyle - staying in bed, in one room won’t have helped his mental state. You could ask the GP to assess his mental state/memory.
I am really against beds in living rooms. An easy solution for an OT wanting a discharge but then just creates problems for the family who end up with no normal entertaining space.
@Butterfly23….welcome to the forum. I really feel for you. My husband (59) has had mobility problems for years, over the last year he’s had several serious medical conditions (stroke, hernia op, sepsis) which resulted in him being bed bound in hospital and then moving to a home to do physio then coming home after being away for 7 months. When he came home he wouldn’t engage with the physios so they withdrew their services within the first week. He then said he was doing his exercises and walking (he wasn’t, his idea of exercise was to stand up in one spot and shuffle feet), he was also in adult nappies and using urinals with no attempt to try to use the bathroom with the carers. All this resulted in us having a big row and social services moving him to a care home where he is now. It’s so frustrating when they don’t help themselves and won’t open up to you to tell you why they aren’t. I really feel
for you and am here if you need to talk. Sending a big
This happened in 2022 as well, but he was in better health then and was walking again after 3 months, but with a walker. He never fully recovered from that when he fell again this time. So I think because his health is worse this time, it 's taking longer for him to get better.
Thanks. Yes I’m kind of going through the same thing, except he can’t even stand so I’ve learned how to do bed pans and changing sheets while he’s in the bed. I really am a full time carer right now.
@Butterfly23….so sorry you’re having to do all this, it’s not easy. My husband is a big guy and I wouldn’t have been able to do bedcare overnight. We were having to call carers out at night if anything happened!!
