Well I sort of got over Christmas

My dear Dad died suddenly in his sleep on 30th September, just two weeks short of his 92nd birthday. I had been his carer in increasing stages over 3 years, this was after being Mum’s for over 3 years.

I was dreading Christmas, I’m only just getting used to living in my own, but I spent most of the day after Church on my own. My wish and I got through it.

I was so busy, or kept myself so since he died I’ve reached the point of “what do I do now” I am an only child, never married and never had children. Now it’s just me. Finding the future a bit daunting, but hopeful I will survive this total change in my life.

I still feel so very tired, seems that I have sleep deprivation to catch up on, but my main problem is the guilt that maybe I didn’t care for them enough. They were my life. So what now I ask myself. :-???

Guilt is a stage of the grieving process, it will pass.
I’d recommend a book called “Starting Again” by Sarah Litvinoff, to help work out “where do I go from here?”

I go to a singles only hotel in Crete every year, it’s where I learned to live and laugh again after my husband died. A very healing place.