Hi All
I am new to the forum and new to caring.
I work full time and care for MIL since January after her stroke. I have Asian background and culturally it falls on the daughter in law to look after her. Just wanted to know if someone out there has had the same problem and how did they cope.
Desperately looking for help and advice

Hi Suki

I wanted to wish you a warm welcome to the forum and to highlight some of the options for connecting with fellow carers and for getting support from Carers UK should you need it. Hopefully you’ll also find others in a similar situation to yourself.

Carers UK are running online weekly meet ups for carers to take some time for themselves and chat to other carers. Feel free to join if you’d like to and there’s no pressure to share anything you don’t want to. I’m sure you’ll find others in a similar position to yourself.

You can find information on how to register to our online meetups at the following pages:

Care for a Cuppa: Online meetups | Carers UK - the next online meet up is Monday 16 August, 15.00-16.00 with further sessions shown in that link. This social is a great way to have a little break if you are able to and spend some quality time talking to people who understand what you are going through right now.

Share and Learn: Share and Learn | Carers UK - these sessions range from creative writing activities to beginners Latin dance sessions.

There is also Carers UK’s helpline should you need advice or support - Our Telephone Helpline is available on 0808 808 7777 from Monday to Friday, 9am – 6pm or you can contact us by email (

Carers UK also provide information and guidance to unpaid carers. This covers a range of subjects including:

Benefits and financial support
Your rights as a carer in the workplace
Carers’ assessments and how to get support in your caring role
Services available to carers and the people you care for
How to complain effectively and challenge decisions.

This is the UK, not Asia, and you are entitled to help here.
Do NOT surrender your life.
How much care does MIL need?
When she was discahrged from hospital, were you told about 6 weeks free care, and Attendance Allowance, and Carers Allowance?