Afternoon sunny and Jane
Is there a particular reason you are all living in a two bed accommodation.
Its the house my parents bought when we were younger. My mum was thinking that we should moved to a bigger house but my dad and brother didn’t wanted to move, so we stayed at this house ever since. My parents just paid off the house earlier this year.
Its been quite difficult for my parents and sister since both me and my brother moved back in from uni (i dropped out/failed in 2018 and my brother dropped out/failed in 2020 during the whole pandemic). I used to share a room with my brother and sister but then when i was 10 my parents gave me and my sister their room while they slept in the living room. After me and my brother went to uni (i was 19 and my brother was 21) my parents made my brother’s room into their own room. Since my brother (age 25) moved back in he’s been sleeping in the living room.
Your parents are very lucky you are at home to help. And I hope you are appreciated!!
I am, the other day my dad said “i dont know what i wouldve done without you” my parents argue a lot (mainly my dad against my brother and mum) but i try to be the middle person and help both my parents.
You should not be worrying at your age. About your sister’s future. Your parents should be taking appropriate long term steps.
They are but i feel like my parents are starting to crack a bit from stress and lack of sleep (same for me aswell). My mum spends all day with my sister (and all night once a week) and my dad spends all night with my sister (since he doesnt go to sleep) while also working a small part time job and taking care of my grandma once a week.
It’s important to look after your own well being too, I know that’s harder now with social restrictions etc but I hope you can find some time for yourself, to go for a walk or read or follow whatever interests you have.
I mostly look after myself, i get space to myself when im working from home and i have so many hobbies to keep myself busy (drawing, skating, sewing, dancing, gaming, watching tv shows). Its just the nights that get tiring or when my sister gets home from going to youth club… She cries, shouts, kicks, bites and scratches for hours until she falls asleep or calm down. When my sister goes to bed i try to keep an eye on her so she doesnt bite any material (since my dad sometimes falls asleep) and when my sister gets home from youth club i try to help my mum calm her down before my next zoom meeting for work. I just wish she didnt get so upset everytime she comes home. Nights weren’t that bad years ago but its recently getting worse, shes much calmer sleeping in the living room but thats where my brother sleeps. My sister nearly always cries when we get home, since our early teens.
I will check some of these links out and show them to my parents.
I do remember when i was a little girl my family would go to this yearly conference called “UNIQUE” i used to have so much fun there but then we stopped going. Im not sure if my mum is connecting to any carers group but i will find that out.
Also the main problem my family is having with getting some help is that so many of the people we have take care of my sister can’t handle her like social workers and people at respites. Most of the time they would say my sister is okay in their care but they struggle etc