I think siblings who don’t take responsibility for their parents have no idea of what it takes out of you both mentally and financially. My dad has carers 4 times a day but every day I go in because there’s always something to be done, partly because some of the carers are lazy, partly because dad doesn’t like asking them to do things, my brother just says leave them to it, but he doesn’t feel responsible.
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My mum had carers 3 times a day, plus a very kind lady who did her shopping, and a gardener. However, there were endless jobs for me. Mum and dad had always been keen gardener. I knew how to prune roses and hydrangeas before I started school! Carers would walk past beautiful roses on the way to the front door, but never picked any for my housebound mum to enjoy. They would buy raspberries at the supermarket but never pick the raspberries in the garden!! There was never any time allowed for jobs that crop up in any home. Mum’s GP expected me to do a 12 mile journey to get a urine sample from mum. Her home was 200 yards away. I was told it wasn’t their job, well it certainly wasn’t mine, recovering from major abdominal surgery, unable to walk properly after a car accident, waiting for knee replacements. We used the same surgery!!!
Hello, Salwilldoit.
Here we go again. Another case of a house left in a will to joint owners, one of whom is unable to buy out the share of the other owner, who does not want it. People mean well in their wills when they follow the principle of equal sharing, but that does not often work with houses. It is better to have the house sold and the proceeds divided.
In this case it is even more complicated - two brothers each left a half share of each of two houses.
Let me summarize the situation so far, as I understand it. Correct me if I have misunderstood.
- Dad’s house has been assessed to be worth £150 000 more than the one abroad.
- The “Bungalow” is Dad’s house.
- You have signed over your share of ownership of the house abroad to your brother. He is therefore now the outright owner of that house.
How did you assign to your brother your share of the house abroad? Is there any legal document certifying this assignment? Did you involve a solicitor?
So it now looks as though you need to assign to your brother £75 000 to make the property ownership equitable. You say that your Dad left you equal sums of money in his will. I presume that this sum would be insufficient to pay your brother £75 000, and you would need to find the difference.
I can understand your brother wanting to do the “split” right away. I think that inwardly you would also like to have the matter settled as soon as possible.
I don’t like the idea of leaving the difference “in the Bungalow”, and leaving all in your will.
- Property value can fluctuate over the years, and go down as well as up. In years to come it could be difficult to evaluate the portion of the Bungalow that does not belong to you.
- Since he has two children, and wills are better intended for the next generation and you would wish to apportion equally, you would be perpetuating the problem of leaving a house in joint ownership.
- In any case I am not sure how practicable it is to leave in your will a house that is neither mortgaged nor owned outright by you.
In short, I would not be keen on going down that road.
So how do you go forward from here? This is my suggestion.
Take out, on Dad’s house, a small mortgage that would give sufficient funds to pay off your brother.
This needs to be only a small mortgage and should not be difficult to obtain. The usual survey and valuation that mortgage providers require would be little more than a formality, because the mortgage would be small in comparison to the value of the house. You would still be advised to have a survey carried our for your own peace of mind. Of course you would need to get a job. It would not take many years to pay it off.
Please try not to dwell on what is and is not fair. You say that you have a good relationship with your brother and if you offer him what he is legally entitled to from the will, there should be no damage to that relationship.
Do involve a solicitor. I would endorse Bowlingbun’s advice - not the one your Dad or brother used. Your bank manager can probably recommend one. In fact, I suggest you discuss this with your bank manager now, if you have not already done so.
You seem reluctant to involve a solicitor. It is in your best interests that you do. A solicitor could come up with further ideas to ease your problem.
You are not contesting your brother. You are simply ensuring that he gets what is rightfully his. He cannot contest that! It needs to be legally certified so that there can be no comeback. You have nothing to be guilty about.
You are not really a long way from being the rightful owner of Dad’s house, a comfortable position. You say you are 55. I was in my late sixties by the time my wife and I had paid off the mortgages.
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