Hungry but doesn't eat

Still looking after this lady with no help or support, I have been making meals but just recently she is just not eating.
I make a meal and put it in front of her , its like I and the meal suddenly don’t exist, turns her attention to virtually anything except the meal.
I don’t want to trigger the argument, that I am not going to cook meals if she won’t eat them, but its a waste of time and food.
just seems to live on coffee chocolate and cigarettes, not very healthily.

Hi Greedyhedgehog,

She is very lucky to have you.

Have you tried minute portions e.g. a meal that fits comfortably on a side plate - less daunting. Try ensuring she has the meal before the coffee, so the coffee hasn’t filled her up. Making her coffee with cream added will add protein and fat. If she prefers drinks, she may respond to build up drinks that are coffee or chocolate flavoured. Rule out that she doesn’t have a sore mouth/ teeth or throat nor
constipation.

Sajehar has a thread about encouraging her Mum to eat which is worth a read, just use the search function.

Melly1

Sajehar thread ?

https://www.carersuk.org/forum/support-and-advice/tips-and-practical-advice/flat-refusals-32679?hilit=eat

You may have to coax her. Or even eat ‘with her’. Distraction can help - eg, watching a TV programme ‘together’ so she watches it and eats ‘without noticing’.

That said, give up on ‘healthy balanced diets’. Just forget it. They want ‘sweet carbs’ and really, when old ‘fuel’ is all they need - so sweet carbs is ideal. Don’t try and get veggies down them, or even protein. Cheese is often easier for them for protein (or hot chocolate even) than meat.

:Let her live on puddings - does it really matter if it’s not ‘healthy’?

My Mother hardly eats at all lately. Hot chocolate with cream out of a cup with a spout (amazon) goes down well as do magnum ice creams.

Towards the very end for my poor MIL, the nurses fed her on a kind of semi-solid jelly, whose name I forget. It was easy to slip down her throat, and very sweet, to give her some nutrition. It came in various flavours. We fed her off a tea spoon.