****My partner of over 13 years has battled with depression for at least the the last 3 year. He has always been very open about it and we talk about it a lot. He has tried to manage it himself, with exercise, eating better etc and has also tried numerous medications, all of which he says have given him different side effects or made him feel worse including feeling suicidal to having raging anger.
He hasn’t really taken any medication for over a year. He has been depressed this whole time, varying from mild to severe where he says he has felt suicidal.
Around 6 month ago he was at his worst and agreed to try some medication from the GP. After a couple of days he said he didn’t want to take them anymore as he didn’t like how they made him feel.
He has managed to get by okay…still depressed but still able to go to work etc. He has had bad days and good days.
The last month his depression has been at an all time low. He point blank refuses any professional help and although he talks to me about it, I’m completely at a loss of what I should do. I obviously want him to try medication again. I know there are many, many types and he will likely find one that works. But he says he isn’t going down that road again…i do understand but I just want him to get better.
We have 2 amazing children and have always had a great relationship. We are a very solid couple in every way. Over the years we are less touchy feely but our sex life has remained good, until the last few month - it is non existant. My main priority is helping him get better but because he refuses any help I don’t know what to do.
Recently, because of the depression, he spends his time not speaking at all, watching videos on his phone, lying in bed or on the sofa.i know his depression causes this, but the lack of interaction makes me so upset. It gets to the point where I imagine us splitting up because I already feel alone. I then feel guilty for feeling this way because I know he only acts this way because he is depressed and I love him regardless. He doesn’t realise how it makes me feel and I would never tell him, as I wouldn’t want him to feel it is his fault–it obviously isn’t!
I just want him to feel a bit better, for himself, for our relationship and for our family. I just don’t know how to encourage or persuade him to get professional help!